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Muse has officially lost its mind with today's story starter. 🤣 "Puberty was awkward enough before dodgeball came with an STD twist." Zoe Martinez has finally found the perfect escape hatch from social obscurity: a wildly inappropriate, ridiculously elaborate sex-ed obstacle course

promising the holy grail—free pizza for an entire year and guaranteed popularity. Armed with fierce determination and unbothered by tact, Zoe charges headfirst into this hormonal Hunger Games, sidestepping "gonorrhea grenades" and

somersaulting across precarious birth-control balance beams without bothering to check who's flattened beneath her ambitions. Enter Miles Greene—kind-hearted, overly earnest Miles—who

insists that friendship and understanding should matter more than winning, clearly misunderstanding the sacred laws of high-school survival. As alliances splinter, dodgeballs bruise egos, and the absurdity hits catastrophic new highs,

Zoe finds herself tangled up in witty arguments and unexpected feelings she dodged harder than Chlamydia. Suddenly, victory feels more complicated, laughter comes easier, and maybe