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Yes FedEx, I’m sure you really did attempt to deliver that package. The complete black screenshot of “my front door” and submitting that update from ~20 blocks away really sells it.

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I don’t understand how modern delivery is so awful. I’m not asking for the world here, if something needs my signature, an automated system should be able to ping me 5 minutes early so I can wait outside and speed up the driver. Instead, they’re egregiously backed up and have to lie about attempts.