Maple

Might be the greatest opening paragraph of anything ever.

G.K. Chesterton had a line about this in “The Man Who Was Thursday”:

I do not understand how “the government is an evil authoritarian kleptocracy in thrall to capital backing a genocide” and “the government won’t pick on me for crimeposting on main because I’m a smol bean” are reconcilable beliefs.

Don’t let yourself off the hook, btw, if the angle which you took when writing about this was how Brave And Important undergrad activists or protestors were, btw. You are absolutely part of the fucking problem, maybe a smaller part, but you’re the foil that the Atlantic writers needed occasionally.

I’m so angry at every Very Serious Person that was unable to shut the fuck up about this shit for twelve seconds who *directly* contributed to this. I hope whatever clicks you got for focusing on the twee Oberlin contretemps du Jour were worth it.

I hope journalists get another shot at investigating an elderly president’s mental faculties. it really sucks they missed they missed their only chance.