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And not just burnout of a recent months long hyperfixation. I fear of not being able to return to it ever again.

My ADHD is giving dividends today. My Fastmail won't talk to Thunderbird and hyperfocus has kicked in, allowing me to stagger through the incomprehensible jargon to get it going. It's so far taken about 20 hours.....er.. with a glass of red, even at 1700 hrs...

"I enjoy this too much. I can't imagine not doing this. So this time… it will last for a long time, right?"

I feel that fear greatly