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What if we threw a parade with more people getting paid by the city to keep people off the route than spectators? Hypothetically, of course.

Who needs music when your parade can just have the endless wail of sirens?

This amazing celebration of a proud legacy ended in less than 8 minutes.

OK, a trailing float just came by, so maybe it's not done, but spectators are clearly done with it.

Nevermind, it's not done. There was just a long gap.

I was wrong about it being a short parade. I continue to be right about there being far more people marching in it than watching it.

Not beating the noisy stereotype.

I dearly wish humans would devise ways of signaling ethnic or national pride that didn't involve revving engines.

Out of tune marching band competing with blaring Frank Sinatra recording for what is giving me the worst headache.

After one hour and 40 minutes of sonic torture, I was nearly ready to concede the point that Italy is a real country. But the noise just ended!