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its kinda depressing when i realize that i cant keep any sort of relationship because im so used to having to move on quickly. i wish i could have a life long friendship but i dont think that was ever truly meant to be

when you constantly have the only peers you connect with not sharing classes with you etc by the next year it really fucks with you on a structural level. often times i move on but i occasionally feel as though i truly click with someone and i end up becoming dependant on the high they give me

and that ends up completely breaking the relationship because i get too attached until they have to forcefully remove themselves from the grasp i didnt know i was holding

i sometimes feel like im a danger to the people around me because i can never know when this will happen to me. like im a ticking time bomb