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I need to undergo hypnosis or something to get my gag reflex to stop rejecting mayonnaise bc I'd love to be able to just go get a burger anywhere and not have to worry about what the secret sauce recipe is

have you had Kewpie mayo before? Not sure what they did but that Japanese brand made me like it. Grab a bottle of that and put a bit on top of any Asian food (even better with chili crisp too). And of course you can try to put it on sandwiches in small amounts too.