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You’re so wise

As someone who collects retellings of Beauty & the Beast, I can report this is basically true. The exception is sometimes the heart is already soft, and you must see beneath the surface to enjoy the hard dick.

nods nods nods

Heart soft, dick hard, but most importantly? Fur combed.

✨Poetic✨ and also… accurate 😂

🙂‍↕️

I have been told by a woman with a master's degree that the secret to a happy marriage is to keep your husband's belly full and his balls empty, so I think you're fine

Sir.

An award winning degree, even

LMAO *barrel-chested old guys

😌😌😌

Well that’s okay then, peaking now means the rest of your life is a relaxing downhill slope, right??