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Why not do what I do and get your father in law to buy you the Viz annual for Christmas?!

Went to the cinema to watch a subtitled film but no matter how much tippex i chucked at the screen the words wouldn't just vanish! When i took it back for a refund they refused saying "You know how movie projectors work?" Well i'll be damned if i go look it up just from the impertinence of it all!