ʕ•ᴥ•ʔっᯓ🎃

hey.

its so hard to get my helix piercing back on with these FAKING TALONS 💅🏻

my butthole started hurting during the mri and I thought "oh shit do I have metal in my butt???"

they had to stick me 4 times to get a vein

going for my mri! wish me luck!!

ah!

I did my part! lordy so much cat hair

idk what this guy is trying to do

hooray I don't have diabetes!

unclench your butt cheeks my dudes

Meh. Didn't do what I was hoping 😭 wanted to lighten the dark red a bit but i guess the topper had more blue in it than I thought Essie Wicked with Mooncats Ghost of Hecate ontop

i wish i had a sibling that loved me

i was revan the whole time!?

ran out of pain killers so im just rawdogging life

man. why you gotta make me go up three flights of stairs? im disabled!

💔💔💔💔

bro gots his butt in my face

im reading discount dan. its a lot like dungeon crawler carl! like it so far 😊

I cant wait to be off blood thinners so I can smoke weed again

to nobodies surprise, it was russia all along

I burnt my fingie on the damned costco chicken alfredo

the urge to steal large decorative rocks from people's yards is overwhelming

please leave me alone

a jahovah witness tried to indoctrinate me

Mm, whatcha say?

missed a video call from marymarygod1987

I swear I havent gained weight, doctor! I just havent pooped in two days!

keep a little dirt under my pillow for the dirt man

if I go on glp-1 I hope I keep my phat ass

anyone wanna add me as a family member on their prime account???

of course it started raining the moment I stepped outside

dang doc is prescribing me glp-1 also get to do a home study for sleep apnea

I think it's BS that if you're late to an appointment you get fined, but the doctor is always late and that's okay.

last time I was in hospital I had my blood drawn like 17 times. big pharma wants to steal all my blood

jaaaaaames baaaaaaxter

how come I take a selfie and you can see every pore on my face, but when I try to take a picture of a squirrel it comes out like this

fuck EA