Paige’s comedy I MAKE THE RULES

I’m a strong believer in the word crevasse. I’ve used it in out of context situations as a running joke with my friends since high school and we could really make CREVASSE the next RAW DOG

it’s so rude and insensitive to not say “bless you” when my dog sneezes. she has seasonal allergies !!!

honestly being an ex friend of mine is the biggest self report

this is the only correct definition of mIsAnDrY

apparently it’s NOT normal for the adults to always say “life sucks and then you die” when you’re a kid well anyways

bitch, i am spy kids

the older my fluffy cloud gets, the more spoiled she also gets

Gravity is a mic drop with no obligation

tucker c and candace o are thesame(horseshoe theory)

each day on earth as a woman i am left no other option than to hate men a little bit more. it’s like the endless pit

it’s happening!!! #MESSYtheshow

men really only start to earn their value in our lives when we assess their importance based on how willing they are to do stupid little things for us #dating

after one listen of his new album, i’m completely in love with genesis owusu

another day that neither of my parents are willing to denounce their “jesus will save the world” trump delusions

mommy needs a fridge cigarette

Zelenskyy and the people of Ukraine doing the lord’s work #freeukraine

ever since jd was made the “fraud czar” which is the funniest thing ever, i’ve been waiting for @coffeezilla.bsky.social to make a video about govt fraud dreams really do come true!

they hate me because i’m actually iconic and they become obsessed because they’re actually SO IN LOVE

what gives me hope is realizing that there are two sides to the coin and that their overwhelming abuse of women (and our CHILDREN) is what is going to bring us to matriarchy we will center the people in society who need protection the most. men can’t/won’t ever do this. we outnumber them - 51% !!!

i’m so good at writing dramatically in corporate speak

actual text i just sent to my mom : we’re just 2 broke bitches with crippling art supply addictions. wouldn’t have it any other way

i’m literally begging the evil billionaires to colonize mars. what a great idea !!! win/win 🥰🥰🥰🥰 (do they know that the difference in gravitational pull is a problem for your body?? prob not)

thiiiis IS my best behavior

not the fools gold statue of a r@pist with the same body as my r@pist ex husband !!

the trump checks are a ponzi scheme

the USA is a psyop

maga is out here shitting and pissing themselves in the comments sections saying that ThEy DoNt PaY tAxEs tO i$REAL BRO THEY STILL CAN’T SEE IT yes 👏 you 👏 do

THEY not like US because i would never consider hurting another human being and have used my own FREE WILL to educate myself and worked fucking hard to be a success story in an industry i previously had 0 knowledge about

in life it’s either suck it UP or suck it OFF

i’ve never chased a friendship / relationship of any kind. i respect free will. call me a free will absolutist

candace “candy” coping about her lesbian fantasy posts (at best) is a special treat that none of us saw coming but we deserve it with the maga collapse timeline we’re all being forced to endure

you wish I was your sensei 

I ordered a box of colorful squishy poop piles on the Internet so that I could start a movement called #ElonEat💩 and I’m going to make custom stickers for the bottom of them asking other Tesla owners to spread the word. I’m starting the trend in Portland. could be a silly gag tee xoxo💖💖💖💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩

add this to your morally neutral public nuisance activities list

it’s a pretty fucking huge flex to not have any regrets in how you choose to spend your time and treat others

i’m kinda good, kinda bad

this is my lived experience, even with “christian” guys AND their pastors. morally bankrupt anx hypocritical all around. evil men love covering for each other’s crimes but that world is waning. we (women) are building a better world

i’m literally never going to shut up again for the rest of my life !

I was raised in purity culture in the 90s, so it is a privilege to know me in my refined phase where I use “cunty” as a positive adjective 

too hot to care about literally anyone’s opinions of me. i’m free

as an ex-evangelical homeschooled kid from the 90s, i’d like to say that i completely understand why trmp still has 37% of his “base” left Ⓜ️🅰️G🅰️ the conspiracy theorist evangelical to maga doomer pipeline is noticeable‼️ (also evil people like to sign up to be pastors which is why they’re the worst)

fake bitches are scared of me because i have no fear (bc i embarrass myself on the internet on the reg)

They warned us Mamdani would impose Sharia law. Instead, he unleashed the real threat: line dancing in Bryant Park.

most evil influencers: andrew taint mr beast logan/jake paul candace owens erika kirk lauren boebert natalie harp

meeting a male man hater like 🫦

no one asks how a failed child actor is doing !!

twin > twink

beauty fades but being cringe is forever

instagram blocked this comment “dystopian as fuck” on this video of UN’s walkout today of net+yahoo but that is the perfect comment 😭😭