Dan Shattuck

Whats worse: destroying your entire country, or admitting you were wrong?

Suffering from authoritarian rule? Let the US and Israel liberate you by airstriking your family. War=Peace

Cheesy Gordita Crunch.

Google AI’s summary of Henry VIII includes this absolute gem.

I'm sure Melania thinks it's because everyone hates her, but it's actually because she's just not that interesting.

I have a significant number of socks that are marked right and left. In theory, I should choose the correct first sock 50% of the time, but my lifetime hit rate has got to be was so in the 20s. Weird.

Grams are better than ounces. Yards are nonsense. Miles are an abomination. BUT Feet are better than meters. Fahrenheit runs laps around Celsius.

Here’s the thing, humans have no business driving cars. We show our whole ass everyday, in every possible way.

Is Petite Plume selling a progressive harem lifestyle?

I think it’s funny that baseball players are almost uniformly conservative and baseball writers are almost uniformly communist.

The exact same home run Rajai Davis hit off Aroldis Chapman in game 7, 2016.

Watching SEA @ TOR on Sling and the audio sync seems off by about 1/2 second. Anyone else getting that?

It’s nice that Twitter isn’t Twitter anymore cuz now we can just call everything tweets.

I challenge you to find greater last words than those of Sister Catherine Rose Holzman, who said “To Katy Perry, please stop” and then collapsed.

Reality is engaging in a major counteroffensive. Not sure it will persevere, but at least it will go down swinging.

Weird level of cruelty directed at Andrew Vaughn tonight from the online baseball community.

Doesn’t matter if the room’s completely empty, every time I stand at a urinal I’m afraid someone will come from behind and smash my face into the wall while my dick’s out.

Elvis, today.

Absolutely using my ASG votes for this worthy project.

Pfaadt gave up 8 ER on 31 pitches and did not record an out.

What exactly does ONE YEAR LATER mean in Star Wars? One Earth Year? We’re in a galaxy far, far away. One Coruscant year? How many Ghorman Days in one Coruscant Year? How many Yavin 4 Hours in a Ghorman Day?

i’m begging you please god someone invent an alternative to hyperion

actually i love trump and i always have www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...

I am 100% confident that the opening credits for Your Friends & Neighbors holds the record for most names with a double letter.

The 8th inning in this ARI @ CHC game has to be historic in some way. Most combined runs in an inning with two lead changes?

I hate his personality and the way he communicates and how he divides the country, but whatever, he’s good on the economy.

If you think a bully can accomplish more than a leader, you haven’t been paying attention since middle school.

of all the things i don't understand, Pete Davidson is the one i don't understand the most

If you fancy yourself a "free thinker" and you find yourself suddenly, for the first time in your life, very anti-Canadian... you need to take a hard look in the mirror.

most of my goals are own goals

How long can bangs be before they cease being bangs?

I do not believe there was an earthquake. Liars.

Got a new car and I’m suddenly very bad at remembering my belongings. My phone, my keys, my wallet — regularly forgotten in the car. I don’t remember this with new cars in the past, or with rental cars, but with this car my forgetfulness is profound. Anyone ever have that experience?

The internet has never wanted me to buy something the way it wants me to buy a heavy weight t shirt.

Seems like a really good time to do big crimes

Is Severance good or merely interesting?

The Lifetimes Tour. It’s honestly just pathetic.

Imagine how much you have to hate America to think literally our worst person should be king.

This Haaretz piece of IDF soldiers’ confessions of human rights violations absolutely wrecked me www.haaretz.com/opinion/2024...

The thing that really gets my goat when the puppy pisses on the carpet is how unrepentant she is.

yeah sure me too www.mlbtraderumors.com/2024/11/ty-f...

Bike people look really quite silly when they’re off the bike.

My 6 yr old is screaming mad, swears she listened quietly to 45 minutes of a baseball statistics podcast and did *not* fall asleep in the backseat.

Turns out “cancel culture” is anytime someone voices displeasure with something you said or did. And it’s *checks notes* very bad.

I would never, ever have guessed this.

If every liquor and beer company took on a trans spokesperson, would it effectively wipe out alcoholism in red states?

What stage of capitalism is it when everything is made out of cake?