The Dark Tower Bot

Hello Constant Readers, We're always looking for new quotes to be added to the bot. Whether they're from the main series, related works, or even media that appeared in the cycle (like song lyrics, poetry, and the like). We accept suggestions in DMs and replies! Long days and pleasant nights.

May your first day in hell last ten thousand years, and may it be the shortest.

He knew that however much she might love him, he would always love her more. And as always when he thought these things, the premonition came that ka was not their friend, that it would end badly between them.

If a prostate check is an exam, that was a motherfucking safari.

'Have the wish I wish tonight,' Eddie said, and thought: Please, always you. 'Have the wish I wish tonight,' she echoed, and thought If I must die in this odd place, please let it not be too hard and let this good young man be with me.

Hey Jude, don't be afraid You were made to go out and get her The minute you let her under your skin Then you begin to make it better

He cried out but his cry was lost in the golden blast of some tremendous horn. It came from the top of the Tower, and seemed to fill the world.

It's a long walk back to Eden, sweetheart, so don't sweat the small stuff.

It was just another showdown in another empty street. That was all, and that was enough.

I have forgotten the face of my father.

Baby-bunting, darling one, Now another day is done. May your dreams be sweet and merry, May you dream of fields and berries. Baby-bunting, baby-dear, Baby, bring your berries here. Chussit, chissit, chassit! Bring enough to fill your basket.

'For Gilead and the Calla!' he roared. 'Now, gunslingers! Now, you Sisters of Oriza! Now, now! Kill them! No Quarter! Kill them all!'

I come in the name of Eddie Dean, he of New York!

Don’t let me die naked and needing a fix, God, he prayed.

Roland threw his head back and thanked God. God and Eddie Dean.

It was just another showdown in another empty street. That was all, and that was enough.

Not all is silent in the halls of the dead and the rooms of ruin. Even now some of the stuff the Old Ones left behind still works. And that’s really the horror of it, wouldn’t you say? Yes. The exact horror of it.

It seems to me that none of this stuff is mine, that I’m nothing but Roland of Gilead’s fucking secretary. I know that’s stupid, but a part of me sort of believes it.

The man in black fled across the desert and the gunslinger followed. June 19, 1970 - April 7, 2004. I tell God thankya.

Because the difference between seeing and not seeing can be the difference between living and dying.

You walk an evil way, gunslinger. You stand in shadows. You stood in the shadows of the holy place last night. Did you think I couldn’t see you?

If I’m going to ride what he calls the handsome, Jake thought, I’d just as soon go with plenty of company.

Cease, gunslinger. Strike your camp and turn back northwest. In the northwest there is still a need for men who live by the bullet.

When I think of those East End lights Muggy nights The curtains drawn in the little room downstairs Prima donna Lord you really should have been there Sitting like a princess perched in her electric chair

'For Gilead and the Calla!' he roared. 'Now, gunslingers! Now, you Sisters of Oriza! Now, now! Kill them! No Quarter! Kill them all!'

When I think of those East End lights Muggy nights The curtains drawn in the little room downstairs Prima donna Lord you really should have been there Sitting like a princess perched in her electric chair

NORTH CENTRAL POSITRONICS, LTD. IN ASSOCIATION WITH LaMERK INDUSTRIES PRESENTS ANDY Design: MESSENGER (Many Other Functions) Serial DNF-44821-V-63

Roland loved her because she would fight and never give in; he feared for her because he knew he would sacrifice her—Eddie as well—without a look back. For the Tower. The God-Damn Tower.

Our time here is brief, our risk enormous. Don't waste the one or increase the other, if you please.

(insert your favorite Detta quote about 'voodoo' here)

Ka works and the world moves on.

What I'm saying is that I'm trying to find rational reasons to explain irrational feelings, and that's never a good sign.

Commala-loaf-leaven! They go to hell or up to heaven! The the guns are shot and the fires hot, You got to poke em in the oven.

He cried out but his cry was lost in the golden blast of some tremendous horn. It came from the top of the Tower, and seemed to fill the world.

For every brick that landed on the ground instead of some little kid’s head, for every tornado that missed the trailer park, for every missile that didn’t fly, for every hand stayed from violence, there was the Tower.

'FIDDLE-DE-DEE, SAID SCARLETT, WE’LL TALK ABOUT THE BEAM TOMORROW, FOR TOMORROW IS ANOTHER DAY!'

If it's ka it'll come like a wind, and your plans will stand before it no more than a barn before a cyclone.

He felt awe as he looked up at those stars, but also a deep and abiding contentment, such as he had felt as a child, safe and warm beneath his quilt, drowsing half in and half out of sleep, listening to the wind sing its lonely song of other places and other lives.

Would you still? Very well, then, come. (Do you hear me sigh?) Here is the Dark Tower, at the end of End-World. See it, I beg. See it very well. Here is the Dark Tower at sunset.

You did yourself ill to feel well of those to whom ill must eventually be done.

I asked one draught of earlier, happier sights, Ere fitly I could hope to play my part. Think first, fight afterwards—the soldier’s art: One taste of the old time sets all to rights!

First comes smiles, then lies. Last is gunfire.

And the quiet, singing voice of the rose. The song that promised all might be well, all might be well, that all manner of things might be well.

'You believed you believed. You believed on the top of your mind. Do you believe itall the way down now? All the way to the bottom?'

Such lack of understanding was frightening. He’s right, the gunslinger thought. We are broken. Gods help us.

He knew that however much she might love him, he would always love her more. And as always when he thought these things, the premonition came that ka was not their friend, that it would end badly between them.

Commala-come-seven! Salt and yow’ for leaven! Heat em up and knock em down And poke em in the oven.

When is a door not a door? When it’s a jar, and that is the truth.

'Rudeness is forgivable, Blaine; so I was taught in my youth, and the clay has dried in the shapes left by the artist’s hand. But I was also taught that stupidity is not.'

Not all is silent in the halls of the dead and the rooms of ruin. Even now some of the stuff the Old Ones left behind still works. And that’s really the horror of it, wouldn’t you say? Yes. The exact horror of it.

NORTH CENTRAL POSITRONICS, LTD. IN ASSOCIATION WITH LaMERK INDUSTRIES PRESENTS ANDY Design: MESSENGER (Many Other Functions) Serial DNF-44821-V-63