Sean Burke

They made it sound like these water breaks were for player health and safety but they were really just selling ad time during the breaks. What a bunch of assholes

As a hockey fan, I appreciate the #NBA not putting a bunch of playoff games on TV. It really gives hockey a moment to shine. Honestly, fuck the NBA.

trump paradox: sometimes he’s so dumb it’s easy to miss how weird he is, and other times he’s so weird you temporarily lose track of how dumb he is

Apparently if the president of another country is a criminal you can just kidnap him. Has anyone told Canada about this rule? We should text them.

Why is it still talking?

I feel so bad for Zelenskyy. Imagine just trying to defend your country and in order to do it you have to appease this fuckin doofus

The contrast between the calm, professional DC leadership and the braying weirdos who spoke at the White House earlier is jarring

I genuinely have a hard time comprehending how stupid you have to be to support this guy

Us: Can we have healthcare and affordable housing? Billionaires: Holy shit you guys, check out this new AI! Government: You guys wanna go to the moon?

“My jeans are blue” is what Homer Simpson would say after a scientist spent five hours trying to explain genetics to him

Oh! So you think putting the dumbest guy we could find in charge of the country was a bad idea??? Well what if I told you he’s also a sexual predator who preys on both adults and children??? Then what??? Now who’s dumb???

Nothing screams 'HE'S INNOCENT' like shuttering the House for Summer vacay to avoid admitting that the President of the United States is a sex trafficking child rapist.

I see all these stories about how the felon is controlling all these departments and agencies and companies through fear and I’m wondering, where did we find so many fucking cowards?

I suspect that they will eventually release a doctored version of the “Epstein files” with a certain felon’s name mysteriously missing. He’ll declare total exoneration and the nazis will rejoice, and democrats and the media will once again wonder how they got outplayed by the world’s dumbest people

ESPN is doing this 50 states in 50 days thing and it’s honestly the worst. There’s a reason we ignore most of these states.

Believing rights come from god is a big part of how we got into this mess. Rights that come from a magical and non-existent entity are very easy to take away.

Every time I hear some Democrat talk about how republicans are gonna be vulnerable in the midterms I am deeply concerned that they STILL DON’T UNDERSTAND WHAT IS HAPPENING

People that call him "Mr President" make me cringe. That SOB incited a mob and championed an insurrection. He deserves zero respect.

Also, stop framing it as 6 conservative justices and 3 liberal justices. It’s 3 justices and 6 corrupt weirdos.

Everything they do can be easily understood in the context of people who fully expect to never be out of power again.

I’m not looking forward to the next five years of Cooper Flagg being underwhelming on the court while everyone who works at ESPN shouts at me about how he’s actually the best young player in the league and I just don’t understand basketball

Today the regime decided Harvard can’t have international students anymore. I haven’t watched cable news since the election, but I thought this would be worth hearing about. MSNBC & CNN have spent the 4pm hour talking about not that, which is why I don’t watch those assholes anymore.

I’m currently sitting through a one hour public employee conflict of interest training in a country where the president’s entire economic policy is openly soliciting bribes

Bill Maher is the Joe Rogan of Dennis Millers

I once heard some call Chuck Schumer a human strip mall. I can’t say I full understood the metaphor, but it felt accurate.

I can’t say I know for sure what the correct move is for Democrats tomorrow night, but what I want them to do is all walk out of the chamber as soon as he starts talking

If your god was real, you wouldn’t need to pay for Super Bowl ads about him

These are the dems that voted to confirm the guy that just handed the Treasury to Musk: Blunt Rochester Booker Cantwell Coons Fetterman Gallego Gillibrand Hassan Hickenlooper Kaine Kelly King (Independent) Peters Shaheen Slotkin Warner

In blue states in particular, it’s really important for us to do better with who we send to congress in future elections. You can’t fight nazis with cowards

Democrats in Congress: WHAT IS THE PLAN? Going on Sunday shows and spewing consultant speak isn't going to cut it. Twelve inspectors general fired and there's no sit-in? No filibuster? No direction to voters? And in fact, some of you are actually voting for Trump's agenda?

You're the House minority leader. Your job is to stymie the garbage agenda of the very human dipshit who's actually in charge. Get your act together.

Rooting for a bills/commanders superbowl hoping that maybe it would result in less kelce brothers

Amazing how quickly Republicans went from “small government conservatives” to “Actually I think the president should single-handedly decide what gender everyone is”

Spent the day reflecting on my favorite inspirational quote from Dr. King “civil rights are cool and all, but the most important thing in this fight is adhering to political norms and being polite to white supremacists”

Apparently Joe & Jill will ride with Trump & Melania to the Capitol tomorrow. Either Trump is a threat to democracy, & guilty of an insurrection, or not. I believe he is. Biden claimed to believe he is, too. But Biden & many top Dems didn't actually believe it. Otherwise, how to explain this?

Someone, someday, should make a multi-part documentary on how our government got so corrupt. Because it wasn’t just trump showing up 10 years ago and being like “hey have you guys tried corruption?” He’s just the loudest and dumbest.

Capital One: What’s in your wallet? Me: Not my paycheck, apparently

Anyone that goes to this inauguration is complicit. This is not a legal president and NO DEMOCRAT should attend and lend this shame of a proceeding any credence.

Michelle Obama is the sane one here. The only reason any Democrat would go to that sham inauguration is if they still haven’t fucking learned anything after 10 years of this.

I mostly judge coaches on how kind they seem to be to sideline reporters

I’m so glad we followed all those norms and traditions for the last four years. Maybe they will find books about them in the rubble someday.

While Democrats pat themselves on the back all day for being such good little rule followers, the bad guys made their favorite sexual predator President. I’m just wondering if maybe someone should re-evaluate the strategy.

Why do networks feel the need to hype me up about games I’m already watching? I’m here already, you got me, cut the shit and play.

The NFL will penalize you 15 yards for finger guns, which is very silly but also more than our government is willing to do about actual guns

The 12-team college football playoff really is a lot like march madness in that I was pretty interested when it started but now it’s so far from over and I’m already pretty bored

A Christmas Story is a real dumb movie. Not funny, not interesting, just a mess.

Some Canadians seem very mad at other Canadians about…I don’t really know, something involving the prime minister I think

…you just stole an election, and you’re completely getting away with it, nobody is even trying to stop you. You could just lay low and loot the country with your friends, but you’re doubling down on the small-time grifting? Just bizarre.

The radio station I listen to on my commute is now infested with ads for trump watches, trump sneakers, trump dildos…probably. And look, I realize I’m not the first one to notice that there’s something deeply wrong with him, but honestly man…