Fearlicious

Tops take time.. bottoms quick

Purple

Energy independence

So go to the Aston Martin dealership and say “I’ll have the green one” He says, “you can’t afford it” I say,” Oh that’s a myth”

Q: why would you pay your Xfinity bill during the zombie apocalypse?

Yay

Thanks we no longer need you.. we will use the agent you built

"Whatever dark power Trump has that has enabled him to become president twice while being quite literally one of the most morally despicable human beings on Earth, it’s not easily duplicated by your average Republican candidate for Senate, House, or governor." — @paulwaldman.bsky.social

ANT frenzy is funny cuz it’s all a false belief you can make a bunch of money off it and spend it… before it destroys everything

And in long term.. what was it?… oh ya.. ALL DEAD

Perfect fall day at the office

You are def doing something illegal

I thinks it’s wild that the GOP is defending Vivek’s sick ad but offended by making fun of Cheesecake Factory

How do you fence 1 million in certified Pokémon cards?

Million dollar Pokeman card heist … that’s the story

I have no problem w trans fats playing w the regular fats.. Gnite everyone tip the waitress’ try the veal!

My uncle invented radar can you believe it? Why doesn’t someone just say “ no I can’t cuz he didn’t “

My man looks like knows how to “my man”

This is easily proven to be false.. unless his uncle was a Scottish physicist

20…22.. whatever

Teacher: please do problem number 7 Kid : who do you work for?

Melania short on cash makes appearance w Glump

Trump making “ who do you work for?” The new “Who are you wearing?”

Who do you work for? Answer any news org You are fake news lol

“He’s got the White House looking like Saddam Hussein opened up a Cheesecake Factory” — Obama

A McHenry is now the shortest employment length then a Zacharia then a Scaramucci . Thank you

Can I say I have polyps on my colon smarter than Joe Borelli @cnn.com

Good is Bad

Dipshit says whut?

Trump has white clown lipstick on !

Senior Adviser to Melania is the glaring DOGE miss

El-Sayed: "We had a little debate. Or I had a debate and he just pointed at me and said, 'He's Muslim.'"

POTUS to fly to Florida today to tell gathered morons he can identify a cartoon of a snake then play golf

After hearing this a million times I get the impression he called a giraffe a snake

Seller came back to me w Seller Financing Wed. I said, well y to hats not the issue but I’ll hear the terms!

It’s a great day when something like this”Ethan Klein Affair” is all over the stream and I’m sipping coffee going.. no clue who that is !

Paid over 100k in fuel surcharges in last month.. not enjoyable

Cuz she’s a hooker plant.. this is not news

They Gouda done much better

I’m sure it’s fine

What in the name of all mankind is the shitty decorations hanging in Scott Jennings house???!!! The horror..the horror

What no more Hanson Cabs in Central Park?? Did Rusty eat too much Beefareeno???

Wait a gosh darn minute there! Last week it was a Giraffe!!!!

Not happening

Really stupid and vile thing takes place. GOP strategists: run with it!!!

ES 7677 low Troll-a-licious

Morning Dew in My Pants