Plumber Charged Extra for Ghoulie

What's that howling?! The wolves of October are baying for the blood of my annual horror festival! From SOV to A24, it's time for another pack of good, great, and terrible horror films for the 31 days of the month! What macabre monster-pieces lie in my future? Ye shall have to wait and see!

67. 28 Years Later: Bone Temple (2026) - Picks up seconds after 28 Years Later ended. Spike is caught up in the Jimmy Savile gang of Satanists and Dr. Kelson continues to build his temple one bone at a time and treats the head-ripping giant Samson. Serious, surprising, never forgets the gore.

66. Blood Diner (1987) - Two brothers are indoctrinated into a cult to help their uncle (a brain in a jar) bring the evil goddess Sheetar to life. They make her a frankenstein body and run a diner that serves human flesh. It's a gory horror comedy. A woman gets her head battered and fried alive.

65. Whoever Slew Auntie Roo? (1972) - Shelley Winters stars as Auntie Roo, who keeps her daughter's nasty skeleton in a crib. She invites orphans over for a Christmas feast and finds a lookalike for her dead daughter. But the lookalike has a brother. Meanwhile her servants are scheming to rob Roo.

64. The Mummy Theme Park (2000) - American PR people get hired by Egyptian sheikh for his mummy theme park featuring resurrected cyborg mummies telling mummy facts. Gets compared to Tim & Eric or The Room, but more in common with the handmade FX auteurism of Guy Maddin. Not good, but it's great.

63. Cheerleader Camp (1988) - More of a raunchy summer camp comedy than a slasher. Everyone treats the piles of corpses as annoying and keep camping until nearly the end. Tons of nudity, Leif Garrett's unfortunate hairline, actual good kills, but still boring. Betsy Russell's hotness can't save it.

62. Final Destination 2 (2003) - I expected to hate Final Destination and the first installment was pure fun. Yes, the characters suck and the acting sucks and the dialogue sucks BUT just like in the first one all the kills are loving Rube Goldberg death traps. Opening scene rules on this one. Fun!

Any one of you who still thinks there is a single bit of difference between this place and X is in for a rude, rude awakening

61. Thirst (2009) - Park Chan-wook's horny priest vampire movie has original take on vampires. Constant slurping and licking. Serious, but also silly. Imagine a scene from Parasite where at the end the dad flies into the air or crushes someone's neck. Romance by way of super jumps. That stuff rules.

60. The Nanny (1965) - Bette Davis slaps on giant eyebrows and turns in a creeping psycho performance as the nanny of a young boy who lost his sister and was locked in an asylum. Child actor William Dix knocks it out of the park as the asshole kid who insists the nanny wants to kill him. Does she?

59. Anguish (1987) - Like something out of Uzumaki, Zelda Rubinstein plays the snail-obsessed hypnotist mother of Michael Lerner's murderous stooge. The movie warns it will mesmerize the audience and succeeds on levels that would be giving away too much to describe. Easily one of the best this year.

58. The Mad Ghoul (1943) - An extremely dark horror comedy (for 1943) which features a mad scientist turning his assistant into a zombie to cut out people's hearts and steal the assistant's hot torch singer girlfriend. I've seen a lot of Turhan Bey movies this year and he has a juicy role in this.

ABBOTT: Japanese developers today have unique names, like FromSoftware COSTELLO: From what ABBOTT: FromSoftware COSTELLO: I thought you said it was from Japan ABBOTT: It is COSTELLO: But what's the name of the developer ABBOTT: FromSoftware COSTELLO: The Software's From Japan, though ABBOTT: Yes

Anti-trans Democrats are spreading poison when we can least afford it, during elections in this ongoing fascist takeover. As a strategy, it’s a recipe for failure. As a moral stand, it’s reprehensible. PS I’m the father of young trans woman and I’ll never forgive anyone who makes her life harder.

Can you imagine how good it must have felt to be the guys who captured the Eagle’s Nest? Drinking Hitler’s beer, stealing his ski poles, etc etc

if you are in Seattle and you drive by my house prepare for the fright of your life

57. Popcorn (1991) - The film program at a college decides on a big class project: a horror movie marathon at a dying movie palace. They bring in gimmicky films with electric seat buzzers and smell-o-rama. All while a creative slasher picks off the crew. Good, fun, until the overlong ending reveal.

56. Thesis (1996) - Angela (adult child actor Ana Torrent) is doing her film thesis on violence. This leads her to her class's resident horror obsessive Chema and, eventually, to a secret campus snuff library, missing girls, and serial killings. This was great until it seemed to end five times.

55. House on the Edge of the Park (1980) - Nasty home invasion pressure cooker. A murderer/rapist and his friend crash a house party. Like The Incident (1967) or Desperate Hours (1955) but nastier. Tough watch captures something intrinsic about America in a way only a sleazy Italian director could.

54. Sick of Myself (2022) - Signe (Kristine Thorp), jealous of her boyfriend's acclaim as an artist, decides she wants fame. She researches and addicts herself to Krokodil like drug that covers her in sores. Kind of like the Substance if the goal was to get the gross side effects. Funny and mean.

52. Impetigore (2019) - From Joko Anwar, director of Ghost in the Cell, this gory, twisty Indonesian horror begins when a machete attack on a young woman reveals a tiny scroll embedded in her leg. She returns to her remote village and uncovers a past haunted by horrors. Gorgeous, eerie and brutal.

uncle boonmee who can recall a giraffe

These fucking shit for brains assholes

To the untrained eye, running home to the United States to celebrate our many and continual victories looks like fleeing, but that is why you must not look at it. Because you would think about it wrong.

51. Bride of Re-Animator (1990) - It's hard to follow an iconic masterpiece like the original Re-Animator but if you're going to try have Brian Yuzna (Society) and Screaming Mad George (RIP) make a grand guignol of body horror butchery. Like a psycho cartoon of monsters. Combs is great as always.

50. The Curse of the Werewolf (1961) - Oliver Reed is the titular werewolf, the product of a serving girl and a werewolf in a dungeon. He was adopted as a boy, now a man facing werewolf problems. It's a hammy Hammer horror production. Looks great (well, mostly), had fun werewolf stuff at the end.

49. Creepshow 2 (1987) - Probably my fourth time and it didn't hold up quite as well as I remember. Still a strong recommend for a fun Halloween watch. All 3 stories have good and bad. The surprise this time was Mindhunter's Holt McCallany as the ripped Native American killer Sam Whitemoon.

I really liked Prophecy and it had great gore, a horrible screaming baby bear monster that they need to keep warm that made me laugh any time it was on screen, awesome setting in the woods, and the guy who played the predator as the giant bear. But damn, that kid is so hilarious.

48. Prophecy (1979) - Frankenheimer packs in the 1970s hot button issues like pollution, tribal rights, evil landlords, and deforestation, puts Armand Assante in red face, and features a giant skinless bear, but the real star here is a kid in a sleeping bag who gets absolutely DESTROYED by the bear.