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Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth announced that the next US aircraft carrier will be named to honor Trump. As many as 4000 sailors will serve aboard the Orange Sex Offender.

Netflix has teased an upcoming series titled The Boys From Brazil, based on the 1976 novel. True to the book, a researcher discovers a secret Nazi plot to seed the world with Elon Musk’s random offspring.

It’s confirmed that the next James Bond will be a woman! Lauren Sanchez has been selected to star in GoldDigger; no date has been set.

Breaking News- President Trump issued an Executive Order this afternoon, renaming the Indian Ocean the "Cowboy Ocean".

Feeling down and need a pick-me-up? Picture the look on Trump's face when he finds out that there's a body of water called the Indian Ocean.

Elon's behavior makes sense when you realize that his toddler, riding on his shoulders, is actually steering him Ratatouille-style.

Joined Blue Sky today and started typing “the “ into the search bar. @theonion.com topped a suggestion list that included @nytimes.com , @washingtonpost.com , @theguardian.com , and @thedailyshow.com. I've finally found my people.