Hugo Buff

I love to do the "extended failed 'its me'" whenever I make a phone call in public. "Hey, it's me!" ... "[First name]... [First name] [Last name]" ... "Your son!" ... "The youngest one" ... "I got you that scarf for Christmas that you never wear... Yeah, me! So anyway I'm about 10 mins away..."

Mansplain, Manipulate, Manifest

I can't be the only one still gaining COVID-weight, right?

Les Dennis' Incredulous Proctology Practice: "If it's up there, I'll give you the money myself"

Boss: I need you to dress smart tomorrow. We have clients coming in Me:

So-called "free thinkers" when their spouse expresses a strong, passionate opinion on something they aren't particularly bothered about

the nascent internet's most exciting thing was the possibility of a single repository of total human knowledge, for me to look up whenever I want. AI is an abomination because it will show you something you've never seen before, and you think you know more about the world, but you only know a lie

So they're really going to give HRT to cis sex offenders as punishment instead of HRT as gender-affirming care for trans people?

@graphcrimes.bsky.social From "What do you think of the decline in modern foreign languages at school?" www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/s/hW...

Gesture a Slim Guide is available with a 30% discount code (AUFLY30) on the global.oup.com/academic website - for the hardcover (and it looks like it works for the very cute softcover too) global.oup.com/academic/pro...

TW: JK R*wling I don't like to give time to this odious shit, but she's just gone full "Racial purity is an innate advantage". Jesus fucking Christ

Do airlines really need to do land acknowledgements? "Attention please, we are no longer in the sky"

Guy who carries around 2 weevils in his pocket so he can make a "lesser of two weevils" joke whenever the occasion calls for it

Look, I don't really want to wade into American politics, but since emblem gestures are my jam, a reminder: gestures are treated in communication as more deniable than words and bad-faith actors can easily exploit this feature.

The Lana Del Rey concert was sold out instantly and within minutes Ticketmaster was offering these resale tickets at 250% of the original price

"Ananas horribilis"? Is that anything?

I love inverting the stress in long words. Favourite so far is "independent" (IN-de-PEN-dent -> in-DEPP-en-DENT)

Yeah, I'm into BDSM Boycott Divestment Sanctions Muslims living in peace

Ok, so Corridor Crew seem to acknowledge that a lot of the expressions are gone and a lot of the gushing is over the technology, but none of them saw the spectral nose?

Just learning that the University of York LongBoi passed away

I love country shows. Everyone in the village walking around all innocent all year as if they aren't secretly harbouring a leek the size of a child

I bought this little painting from a local artist last year and it hasn't stopped bringing me joy. Just chilling on my windowsill

@ityslmemes.com found my shirt brother in France