Sam

Imagine you pour your heart out to your therapist and you find out he wojaked you

Freaked

In my line of work, SI refers to “suicidal ideation”

Just looked into riding the bus to work and got two recommended routes: one that takes me to the opposite side of town over an hour and a half, and then just straight up walking four miles over a route that doesn’t always include a sidewalk.

someone threw a beer bottle from a moving car at my Sri Lankan friend on 9/12/01

getting a doctorate lol

My brother was in a pitch meeting for an ad campaign with Bud Light years and years ago. He suggested they bring back Spuds MacKenzie so much that he got in trouble with his boss.

Once again, I have picked an incredible time to get into academia.

oh my god this is so literally me

somebody ask him what they do on the yacht

I have been thinking about where I can buy a small office garbage can that’s not Amazon, Walmart, or Target. Maybe a hardware store? Is buying it from Staples even better? It’s been three days of this!

I just opened a private practice and most of the networking that happens amongst therapists is on Facebook. I am so annoyed that I have to get my first ever Facebook account in 2026

God I want this sticker

me and John Darnielle posted up at the craps table

I am hearing that, upon signing with the Philadelphia 76ers, LeBron James received the light of Islam and unhesitatingly recited the Shahada.

“I have an idea.” “I have a BETTER idea.”

Without saying your age what is your favorite movie from the year you turned 18

Grant McFlurry

ANTON CHIGURH: what’s the most you’ve ever lost on a coin toss? ME, MY FACE COVERED IN A FROSTY: uhhhh, I don’t normally do this

it's not an own to point out that all these fucking guys trying to deny trans people their hormones are so into HGH and whatnot. they don't care either way about 'gender affirming care.' they want to be he-men and they want trans people to die. to them the two projects are perfectly coherent

man, sometimes I miss the heck out of SAS posting 2003-2014

RIP to Umami Burger. One time I was talking about how much Jared Leto sucks and then, 15 minutes later, he was the only other patron with me at Umami Burger

Harry Kane has resting “being heckled by the House of Commons” face

perhaps you know you’ve arrived in international soccer when you have a massive corruption scandal

action therapist trailer 1-4

a lot of people getting ahead of themselves about other possible excommunications. but don’t despair! there’s always Hell

I am still mad about the Jaylen Brown trade 24 hours later but I will concede that Bill Simmons finding out while coming out of anesthesia for a colonoscopy is deeply funny

tfw a private equity firm buys your favorite team and salary dumps an All NBA player at his peak

ska band outnumbers audience-ass show

In five years my job is only going to be treating gambling addiction and people with AI girlfriends

Therapist: Tennessee Athena can’t hurt you Tennessee Athena:

it has come to my attention that Nashville has a full scale replica on the Parthenon and I gotta say: what the hell, man

me when my very specific academic niche hits the discourse

I seemingly woke up in the middle of the night and read the Wikipedia page for the 2004 Bernie Mac film Mr. 3000

Spurs playing Refused pregame, Spurs in 4

40 YEAR OLD MARRIED FATHER WHO POSTS ON BLUESKY FROM HIS OFFICE JOB: i would never be unfaithful to megan thee stallion... that's simply unfathomable, to me

They say that basketball is a game of runs