JonesyDev

I love the photo they used for this article. The photographer somehow captured both "the malaise of shopping through modern prices" and a glimpse of someone "loosing the battle with the gummy they had, for a fun day of pumpkin carving"

I only know enough one-handed sign language from the Dune movies to ask for two jr. chickens.

It's called Fandom because your CPU fans start running high to load all the ads on the page.

Stupified, while watching Grandma crochet herself to the top of the Gears leaderboard effortlessly.

Why am I this way? Because I didn't get enough tickets in the Womb Arcade for the good stuff.

Samus's insta is just posts of smoldering giant corpses with the tag "Girl Dinner".

It would appear the Kirby no longer wishes to remain captive.

A new circle of hell has opened up, and it is only for fake commentators and streamers who appear within the mobile game ads before my YouTube videos.

Fly, my guinea pigs of the night.

Nostradamus: "...and the fox of the star shall Wii U, as it was Wozzend to be."

Would YOU attend a live Hypnospace concert with a real band playing music + as many of the original artists as can perform? Fill out this survey if you would, we need to know where to take it: forms.gle/rzkjR6t4SsWc...

They died as they lived: Sexy Monster

"Pomni in Fortnite" lingers in the room. As the words echo off the wall and back to me again, my fetal position clutch shivers upon the floor. Such numbness, and yet the wires must make the meat respond.

Everybody talking about Tupac and Evangelion. Welcome to 1995, suckers.

Replacing 20ft ETH cable with another because "one ends doesn't clip right anymore" always feels like an avarice. Throwing a mostly good cable into the trash, feels like saying "Let them eat cake".

LAUNCH DATE ANNOUNCEMENT! Forbidden Solitaire is officially launching NEXT WEEK, on April 30th! We unearthed a new trailer from the archives - an advertisement that originally aired in 1995! Wishlist on Steam and GOG: store.steampowered.com/app/3414580/... www.gog.com/en/game/forb...

My first nightmare, for sure, will be the Tamogachi hitting me with the Red Queen's "You are all going to die down here".

Your mother is so big, the only map she plays in Battlefield is "Strike at Kirkland".

My father told me about how they used to play with balls of mercury on their classroom desks, before they knew that mercury could leech into the body via skin contact and erode brains. This is how I feel about watching people use AI.

Uriel Septim VII: "You? You're the one from my dreams." Do that little dance that you do. The Griddy, you called it. Just like in the dream." "Yes! Look at that! Man, that's a sick little thing. Look at him go. I tried it in the mirror, but he does it so flawlessly."

"Gestures the cross over heart with a broadsword in hand" May your Caeser's never be Little.

To the tune of "Angel" by Nightwish: "I wish I had a sandwich for one moment of lunch."

When your gym session falters, you can always rely on a Locked Club live set. youtu.be/vv_lKuMudnI?...

This is genuinely a greenlight-able game idea right here. Digital salvo exorcism via Action Replay. I get that you died in this house, but you can't hide from this no_clip.

Ugh. Man. I coulda mixed that better. That last shot of vodka was just vodka.

Cargo Fever. 14 Dead.

Fav Super Hero Group: Threetastic Five

Cable TV was 7 seconds behind on the ball drop time. I want to say it's odd that we trusted it, and that it failed at it's only reasonable task.

- How do you have Black Star from Act 1 and have so few relics? - How do you get one shiv in hand, first turn, with no discards? No Time Eater tick?

Placing mistletoe above the reaction chamber to force atoms to kiss.

Ouroboros: "Hey guys! Not to alarm anyone, but I seem to be running out of snake here?"

Special Instructions: Don't cut the pizza. I'm gonna roll the whole thing into a pizza tube that I'll dip straight into a bowl of garlic mayo. Sure, I didn't have to add the last bit to the special instructions, but it's important to let others know if you are suffering.

Code Comment: Program does not work without this first instance of an empty grave. Will revisit later.

"...you reach your hand into the dark and foreboding hole of Windows 11, and pray your fingers don't brush up against something moist, that opens up an Edge web browser tab."

Wine called "Steam Deck Port" that has a wonderful nose.

Y'all think a Country Girl and Boy "who buys Pepero because Pocky is too expensive and Pepero is fine enough" could ever fall in love?

Poe's "The Tell-Tale Heart", but he didn't notice the Pickleball court next door.

Family Feud's Steve Harvey: What you do, right after a new Windows update? Me: Turn off all the new features, Steve

"...but here in The Matrix, I'm based" is a line I wish not to have transpired in my brain.

Life Defeato? Big Dorito!

King: "Send out the prayer hands emoji." Page: "Which skin tone?" King: "...All the skin tones..."

Sir David Attenborough: "...but this lemur wasn't expecting to get absolutely merc'd today. He is sitting there like a dotard. Completely unaware, that he is going to view his own insides in less than 30 seconds. Breathe your last, you little bitch."

Jigsaw: "Don't worry, I built a helpful AI to assist you with this task."

not a joke, sadly. if you need a coder please consider bringing on @marklacroix.bsky.social or @tetronimike.bsky.social because they're gonna need money.

the Marathon alpha released recently and its environments are covered with assets lifted from poster designs i made in 2017. @bungie.net @marathonthegame.bungie.net

$25/hour minimum wage

Instead of asking AI, you can ask me. However, per question, I will still boil a kettle and pour it into the ocean.

Gandalf: "Ah damn, that's someone from my last fellowship of the ring." "Hastefully new fellowship of the ring! To the other side of the bar!"