Keith Topping

secret (n) /ˈsiːkrɪt/ 1) Information known by only one or a few people and kept hidden from others, or shared only confidentially. 2) A nuclear bunker in Kelvedon Hatch.

I'm not usually a Marxist, but I'm with the bitter old red on this one.

Citizens: Remember - don't be a Daft Bastard, put your clocks back an hour tonite. That is all.

Steady on, lads. A win's good and all that but, surely, there are limits on celebration?

These words have just been reached after editing a previous 362 pages, 72 entries, 2000,039 words and 123 footnotes. Of course, it's still not( quite) the end before it gets delivered at the end of the month. But this, nevertheless, feels significant.

Where else?

"... a complete set of steak knives, 7 tickets to see the Brazilian National Mime Theatre at the Riverside Studios, a little can terrier named Bobbie, one of them little black rubber things, you know them little black rubber things that go "neep neep, neep neep", yeah? a big box full of them ..."

Well, now - bloggerisationism update in the area and that. keithtopping.blogspot.com/2026/10/keit...

Under normal circumstances I'm quite proud of being from where I am. However, there are some significant exceptions to this rule. This would, definitely, be one of them.

Hit the blog signal Mister Telly Topping ... keithtopping.blogspot.com/2026/10/stra...

Also a distinctly Italiano flavour to today's HMV purchases.

Part the second.

Another EPIC sesh at the Amaysia with Young Malcolm. Happy to report thatcit was, indeed, geet lush and that.

Today's "from the Glass Half-Full column" sample.

Another luncheonette at The Keel Row with That There Young Malcolm. And lo, twas geet lush in my sight.

Not sure who's bright idea it was to stick Keef in goal. He'd be an effing liability, what with all the heroin and everything. Surely Charlie's the obvious keeper here better positional sense. Can't argue with the choice of The Big Lad up front, though.

I ♡ MY CITY!

Blog type thing. Again. keithtopping.blogspot.com/2026/09/plug...

The cover

Now available for pre-order. Please consider buying one, several or lots. I have a growing Blu-ray collection and a salt and chilli king prawn habit to support. Thank you for allowing me into your Interweb. telos.co.uk/shop/film/br...

is it just me or does anyone else have a problem, even with THOSE odds? Just me, then? www.bbc.com/news/article...

Editing begins today and will continue for approximately the next six weeks before delivery at the end of October. This is going to be a big one.

I think it's the emphasis on STILL that makes it *art*.

Really? I must've missed it. I must have been considering the inherently ludicrous nature of existence at the time. Either that, or listening to House of Love.

I remember buses. I was on two of them yesterday.

At Amaysia, with Young Malcolm.

They got *everything* you need in Aisle Fifteen, it would appear.

Quite a line-up. I'd like to have gone but, being only but four at the time, my mum had the final say on that score. And, she said no. An opportunity missed, dare one suggest?

This week's reading material. Additionally, the reason why the lady who delivers The Stately Telly Topping Manor post now curtsies each time she hands the latest batch over.

A blog and a punch for the first of the month keithtopping.blogspot.com/2026/09/it-m...

I'm hot. I'm sticky. I'm sleep-deprived. I'm haven't been this disappointed with life in general since The Godfather Part III.

Tragically, we never DID get a Mister Spunk in Star Trek. Or, indeed, a Mister Spank.

Good grief, Christina, it would appear that AI do sometimes get some things correct (mainly, it should be noted by taking its information directly via From The North!) Still, credit where it's due. I suppose. Reluctantly.

Blog time. keithtopping.blogspot.com/2026/08/what...

When your back's knackin' you need the best medicine available.

@ Amaysia, with Young Malcolm. And, lo twas geet lush.

It's that there old bloggerisationism time again, dearest fiends. And lo, it was mighty in my sight. keithtopping.blogspot.com/2026/07/bein...

I went to school with Andy Burnham. Not not THAT one, another one. But, I just thought I'd mentioned it anyway, today of all days.

It's that old bloggersiationism time again ... keithtopping.blogspot.com/2026/07/furi...

A German, a Brazilian and a Dutchman walk into a bar. An Englishman is usually with them but he's still *at* the World Cup. Nah, lissun ...

"So, you think there's a market for jewellery coloured like shit?"

Good grief Christina, England in "actually halfway decent performance at World Cup" shock. Well, *that'll* never catch on, clearly.

The finely manicured lawns of The Stately Telly Topping Manor have be, ahem, finely manicured at last.

Blog, Keith Telly Topping, blog like the wind. So, he did. keithtopping.blogspot.com/2026/06/retr...

Having a day off ...

Well, that's just wrong on so many levels ...

Sympathy for the driver?

THANK GOD YOU TOLD US. Does anyone else remember when the Daily Mirra used to be run by ADULTS? No, me neither, I'm only 62.

Funniest Thing EVER: No 147. Sure's advert ("official sponsors of the World Cup") using Cole Palmer landing roughly 48 hours after Tuchel declined to pick him in the squad! Especially as they licensed a Beatles song for the music (presumably paying Sony MILLIONS!) Aw, bless.

Blog, Keith Telly Topping, blog like the wind. So, he did. keithtopping.blogspot.com/2026/05/a-ma...