Machine Pun Kelly

A brief, recent history, according to MAGA (Satire). youtu.be/43aUxhLGBMY

As you can see I posted this January 21, 2025. Unfortunately I was right. We are now living this nightmare

My incredible wife has designed these t-shirts for people who want to inform the undecided voters who aren't on social media. The idea is that people read the back of your shirt while your in line at the grocery store, bank, or whatever. machinepunkelly.com/shop-everyth...

Zecherias is gone. That means there are approximately two Zecherias in on Scaramucci.

Can someone explain something to me? The Republicans blame Biden for the current inflation because of his stimulus spending, but they're going to solve this by sending everyone $5,000 checks? Make it make sense.

It's Talarico's fault that right-wing nutjobs lied about him.

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REPOST THE SHIT OUT OF THIS!!!!! @markhamillofficial.bsky.social @kellyscaletta.bsky.social @corpsepilot.bsky.social @muellershewrote.com @kathygori.bsky.social

Someone should go as her for Halloween. That would scare the shit out of the kids.

If you walk into a room with 100 dogs and 20 of them are rabid, you're not worrying about which ones aren't rabid. Most of them aren't. But you're worrying about all 100. This is a pot about "Not all men."

Trump has moved to significantly reduce automobile fuel efficiency standards, according to a Saturday rant he posted on Truth Social. In addition to the environmental impact, the government’s own analysis shows the decision will drastically increase gas prices. truthsocial.com/@realDonaldT...

The horror has come to our city: ICE has shot a person in Austin this morning. As the facts emerge, I am demanding a full, independent investigation, immediate release of the body camera footage, and accountability for any ICE officer who broke the law.

ICYMI: Bernie sanders has introduced a bill to reduce the US work week from 40 to 32 hours — with no loss in pay. sanders.senate.gov

Biden's last 20 months vs. Trump's first 20 months

Imagine being 10-13 years old and seeing this as you are being raped 🤬🤮

Calling yourself a "High-IQ President" is like calling yourself a cool kid. The very statement itself proves you are not what you claim to be.

Remember this asshole?

BREAKING: 90% of LGBTQ and intersex rights groups globally have lost funding since January 2025. outrightinternational.org/breaking-point

I made tacos with homemade tortillas from fresh-milled flour. Also homemade, fermented salsa on top.

Thinking about how a girl at Christian summer camp asked me if my dad was in Al Qaeda and I got in trouble for asking if her dad was a Klansman bc “her question was understandable”

Nappy McCrappy strikes again!

BREAKING: One of the firemen who carried Donald Trump has come forward. He claims to have pictures to prove it.

@awkword.bsky.social, @voffund.bsky.social, & 50501 are urging you to register & make a plan to #vote in the midterms. #VotingIsPunk #voffund #awkword #50501movement

The call is coming from inside the house.

What if I told you that the White House Ballroom shouldn't be a top priority of the President right now?

Our current prison system isn't working. So why do we spend so much money on it?

“The people who have the most expertise about the prison system are those who are living in it” Scholar and author Elizabeth Hinton on what we can learn from incarcerated people next.haymarketbooks.org/books/2764-h...

Orwell warned us about this.

With the Iran war always in the news, I think the negative impact of mass deportations on the economy is getting overlooked. But the numbers are real. Look at the actual numbers, and tell me they aren't hurting.

Anybody accepting money from Musk needs to be shamed into oblivion.

This is 30% Hard red, 30% Hard White, and 40% rye. It tastes so earthy and hearty. Milling your own flour changes bread forever.

Join me for a new episode of the Pun Show! We'll discuss Hegseth's Navy, Karoline Leavitt, and more! youtube.com/live/AJLT-dZ...

EVERYTHING this man does is to divert the focus from the EPSTEIN Files. E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G.

Would you be pissed if you were on the Decoy Plane?

Today on the Pun Show, I ponder whether Donald Trump is a real and actual sociopath. Plus I talk about the whole Royce White and Enes Kanter WNBA thing. youtube.com/live/w6NSIQV...

The Trump admin admitted in court that they canceled nearly $8 billion in grants for clean energy projects “based solely on the political identity of the grant recipient’s state”. apnews.com/article/trum...

I thought I might have the Taco Bell lettuce diarrhea, but it was just cyclopsmatic.

Pun Show starting now! It's OK to be evil if you're a Republican. youtube.com/live/NvWoM_s...

⚠️Grampa Joke Warning⚠️ @honeygrandma.bsky.social @justold2.bsky.social @princess-vimentin.bsky.social @marti-l.bsky.social @kellyscaletta.bsky.social @stevijoe.bsky.social #GrampaJoke