kess.bsky.social

“You don’t really care for music uwu” Kawaii Leonard Cohen

In honour of the inaugural game of the @wpbl.bsky.social, a match-up poster in the style of my old #blaseball ones. Let's Go Heights, Baby Love Da Heights

Depluralise a movie Jumanjo

I can finally watch Star Trek: Starfleet Academy in peace I’ve worked out that who Sam reminds me of is Little Cook from the 2022 version of Big Cook Little Cook

GWARSH #DisneyMetal

The greatest gift that loving the Railway Children as a kid has given me is seeing two characters have the most minor interaction and saying “they’ll have to marry now”

You’re one microscopic club in his catastrophic plan

My ongoing Blaseball curse is that I will keep having ideas for matchup posters, possibly forever

Why doesn’t Daredevil just talk to the Hand?

Sounds painful

I'm designing @alkennedy.bsky.social t-shirts for Christmas. Here's an Over the Garden Wall design I didn't end up going with

I’ve ended up on ice hockey tiktok and discovered there’s a player called Jack Hughes I hope he has fans and I hope they all dress like Poirot

Dragons, I’m asking for several million pounds for my golden idea: the Aardvent Calendar An advent calendar full of Aardman Animation Christmas tree decorations. Feathers McGraw in a Santa hat. That rat from Flushed Away hilariously tangled up in red ribbon. The Pirates! In An Adventure With Holly

Thinking about how The Railway Children begins “They were not Railway Children, to begin with”, and how that could be an all-purpose first line. “He was not the Great Gatsby, to begin with.” “They were neither the Master nor Margarita, to begin with.” “We were not the Watchmen, to begin with.”

Audio books are amazing I had an audio book version of the Magician’s Nephew as a kid and I still quote the incredibly scenery-chewing way she has Jadis say “SUCH WAS CHARN”, like its the official, agreed reading

Taking into account population (in favour of smaller countries) the countries with the most medals in Tokyo were 1 San Marino (by a LOT) 2 Bermuda 3 Granada 4 Bahamas 5 New Zealand 6 Jamaica 7 Slovenia 8 Fiji 9 Georgia 10 Netherlands

I always think Olympic medal tables should account - at the very least - for population size. If you have loads of people in your country, it’s way easier to find people who are good at specific sports

My expensive perfume and candle making vision? I’m glad you asked: 1. hire Macaulay Culkin 2. get him to slap on some Cypress & Grapevine Cologne Intense and then scream 3. fade in logo JO 🏠 MALONE 4. profit

Biblically accurate Mod

It would be cool to have extra toes because then you could decide the outcomes for a load of non-canon little piggies

Happy we finally have a Tardis that you could stage Starlight Express in

Love lies bleeding is a real downer name for a flower The final verb should be more ambiguous, something where you need to clarify “in a… good way?”, like Love Lies LARPing

I was looking back over a Deck of Many Things I made for @alkennedy.bsky.social I think I still like the panopticon donjon the most

Lucy Beaumont said on Taskmaster that she’s 5’1.5” and was an inch off being cast as Mickey Mouse at a Disney thing. What she didn’t mention, and what I just learned from googling Disney character height requirements, is that she was an inch too tall. Which means I COULD YET BECOME MICKEY MOUSE

Crying screaming throwing up

Me, reading: “he did WHAT? Where’s my glock?” Me, confused: how would a glockenspiel improve this situation?

Me whenever I have enter my pin to pay for something: these beeps are unsatisfying. why don’t they assign notes to these? Me immediately after: oh yeah

I mean, extreme same

Imagining a Sharks and Jets style fight where one side is really into dinosaurs and the other are extremely angry about dinosaurs and everyone’s wearing this shirt