Mark Trail

We both saw it. We're just hoping it comes back again. L. Condor Pasodoble

You know that Rolling Stones song, "Can't You Hear Me Knocking?" This guy absolutely slays it! Mick Tayloresque

My theory is that Dickhead Donnie went to war with Iran to cause the price of gas/diesel to skyrocket, thereby convincing people to buy electric cars. Secretly, he is the world's Eco Warrior, gone rogue to take on the climate! I just realized I'm dizzy - must be the new pain pills. Midas Wellnap

Astrophysicists from Harvard have found a previously undiscovered dwarf planet in our solar system. The object is one of the brightest objects discovered in the solar system in decades. It's orbit appears to be somewhat erratic, depending on the day of the week. Percival Lowell-Beams

Sometimes it's fun to have the guys over for lunch and then just goof around all afternoon. Kiefer Simple

Who's most likely to come creeping into your dreams this time of year? Harvey Badnight

This deal with the horses always creeps me out. Sonny Boneo

A friend's artificial intelligence has sent me into space to search for more inhabitable planets. I'm not sure if I'm looking for additional ones or merely ones that are superior. Neil Strongarm

Nervous excitement abounds - is it Halloween or the election? Darrin Liesda-Rubb

The beauty of autumn touches all of us. Gloria Bounds

Be careful of the company you keep, lest you become overly influenced. Haley Obsession

You can get "high" just by doing your thing! Y. Bea Altered

For those of us who are smack dab in the middle of our golden years, the preponderance of cameras and photographers these days is a double-edged sordid situation. Howie Look

It seems odd to have a president who talks like a bad MC at a strip club. It's not what's worst about him of course but sometimes it's the little things that shiver me timbers. Hal Toupée

I feel like my late October vibe is really coming into focus. Jack O'Lamprey

If I'm going to blame Doug for global warming, I guess I need to blame Johnny for that guy in Blues Traveler. You know, the tweedley-deedley one. Noah Little-Walter

If I may take a moment to brag a little, I feel like I'm getting pretty good at carving these caricature jack-o-lanterns. So far this year I've chosen to do Barack Obama and Pat Benatar. Who else would you like to see me to create? Don Godere

Do you know what's weird? I'll tell you one thing that's weird - I'm observing something criminal and awful going on but I can't call the FBI. Not knowing who to trust is unsettling. Maybe I'll try MI6. Can I still count on Britain? Can I still make a collect call? Myron Hedspinnin

People who say they have no use for the Grateful Dead are merely coming up short when it comes to imagination. Vern Satility

I hear Donnie's presidential approval rating is low, at 35%. This sounds appallingly high. In a sane world, his approval rating would be around 3% and even that lunatic fringe would be expressing doubt. In good news, The White Sisters have endorsed all Socialist Democrat candidates! Paulie Ticken

It's nice to know when to expect the alrightness. Carmen Toucan-Clusion

It's nine days until Halloween and this is already the scariest Halloween of my life. Helga Nuttin-Ondis

Boo Radically! marktrail.substack.com/p/all-hollow...

These guys want to make it clear that while they prefer to be identified as A'aninin, they will tolerate you calling them Gros Ventre but they will not stand for being called Gros Ventre Capitalists. Linus Bendrawn

The Democratic Socialists are hard at work, once again! When I lived in Nevada City I couldn't even borrow a chainsaw. Nora Lenderbe

The creative output of these caballeros still has an analgesic effect on me. Gracias primos! Les Inflammation

After a couple of those A1C tests that describe me as being "pre-diabetic," I've been advised to eat lots of beans. Lucky for me I enjoy eating lots of beans. N. Cecil Frijole

Hypothetically, if you're out at the U-Pick-'Em Pumpkin Patch and a fight breaks out, would you try to stop it or would you just make a really good video that will be in great demand later? Solomon Burka

As a kid, my favorite things at this time of year were the Hee Haw Halloween Special and the potential for this other kind of stuff to break loose out of nowhere. Paul N. Yerlegoff

Hwang Sae-jin knows what you're talking about if you've ever created something beautiful but perhaps a tad busy, also. "I think I just want to add some scissors, lying on the floor." Nolan Wentastop

Does Halloween inherently have a "creepy guy, sneaking up behind you" quality about it? Too many men in the graphics department? Where are all the pictures of the cute, startled dudes? Maybe I'm just seeing things. Otto D. Bushes

I cleared out a drain pipe by the side of the house so I guess I'm all set for the big El Nino winter! I hear it's going to be superwet in Western North America but also crazy drought/hot elsewhere during the next 12 months. It's a free preview of everyday life in 2035! Kelvin Waverly

Hey, where's everybody going? Ken Icome

"An empty wagon makes the most noise." Ward Bondage

Were you there that night at The Whiskey A Go-Go when Van and Jim performed together as "The Fraternal Morrison Twins?" Harvey Mumbleoff

If you marry a flashy guy who's loved by celebrity musicians and they all call him "Nudie," you're going to have to bring your A game. Ida Inspiration

I live in Ukiah. People say there's nothing to do here. However, we just had a contest to see who could grow the biggest pumpkin! Pumpkins, by nature, should unite us. Weren't they a big part of Mythical Thanksgiving? We also have a lot of acorns if you're interested in those. Sassy Squash

It's hard to relax while someone is touching your eyeball, even if they are wearing a white coat. I've tried them all, including the crawling third one, and things still get flinchy. Doug N. Cataract

Give a man a big ol' pike for his living room and he will be interesting for a day. But teach a man to keep a big ol' pike healthy and alive in his living room for years and then things get really trippy. Ray "Zenman" Pettifish

Are you surprised by all the health benefits discovered by facebook scientists that are intrinsic to the simple act of drinking five cups of coffee every morning? Well, I'm not. Joe Anmorjoe

Yesterday it was still warm enough for California-style, comfortable outdoor swimming. But today it feels like we're going to have to take that action indoors. If you don't have a "beach room" set up in your house, you're not really living. Summer Zover

Sometimes I think about the beautiful souls who mercifully have passed away and thereby do not have to try to make sense of these times. Maynard would be profoundly ashamed of the way El Trumpo and his Enablers have betrayed the Ukrainian people. Not to mention all the other shit. A. Valhalla-Pass

Charles Darwin is deeply concerned. He understands the functionality of certain adults self-selecting death by preventable disease but he thinks it's absolutely criminal that these "enlightened ones" put their children at risk of the same fate. Protect all Children - Go Team Chuck! Jonas Salkem

The captions say these were taken on Montana's Flathead Reservation, circa 1908. Apparently a mother dropped her daughter off with the grandparents, who immediately told the girl she could have anything she wanted for lunch. Papa's piggyback rides were also offered. Papa Littleprincess

Do you really think there's hope for us? We come from such different worlds. When you start to sag and I lose my appeal, what will keep us together? Phil DeWitt-Dout

It looks like the new one is almost ready. Kelli Kathy-Katie

I'm pleased when the moon is a big deal. It seems like it should be. It's really pretty amazing! Nira Neighbor

My special lady has selected her Halloween costume for this year. I think it may be my all-time favorite. Now I need to come up with something good. Doc Souper

Dancin', Diddlin' or Dada - what's it going to be? Wayne D. Options