Mousmine

Actually here's a special way. I just whipped together a page on my personal website to read them, and they link to the posts if you click on them. -> mouses.house/ggm.html

why Do you keep your little bottle of commemorative coins right next to the REAL melatonins anyway

In the ICU after accepting a handjob from the dyspraxic homie

bro that must not have been melatonin we took. It was melatonin commemorative coins

Burnt my mouth on fropi today (heh yeah I can call 'em that, me and frozen pizza are tight like that)

Any time something good happens in your life, you should be asking yourself: do I deserve this?

my game is good, the algorithm just ignores me

Is this Pop Music?

it's hard work being such a high quality babe

He's the nice video game nerd. He doesn't say stuff like turd. He would never flip someone the bird.

Hello evertone The travel plans of Sean and Ashimak's group has been put on hold for 90 days since the DEC and Uganda declared outbreaks of Ebola in mid-May. The Government of Canada has temporarily suspended the group's immigration documents. Give if you can www.gofundme.com/f/support-fo...

Fukin u with my bald dick and just when I am about to Complete, suddenly.. Pubes Mode Engaged

That tesla flying car business looks like a shitty flash game

I do feel like I'm effectively another species of human from almost everyone else.

Overheard Normie #1: Holy shit. I fucking LOVE when stuff is SO pungent and it just keeps violating my nostrils with TERRIBLE smells. Overheard Normie #2: Samesies! And oh my God, overwhelming loud noises... I just CANNOT get enough My autistic ass: ...Sorry, but am I REALLY the weird one here?!?!

Ok let me get this straight. You're saying there's a beautiful lady... and it's making you SAD???

Telling a very funny joke to a lady every time she's taking a sip of her water so she laughs and spits it back into the bottle (rubbing hands together evilly) then asking for a sip and getting allll that yummy yummy backwash

they say einstein was a genius but did he ever think to go out drinking with his bros after a long day? Lacking street smarts

I'm just a stupid idiot from the sticks, but I've finally made it to Blow Job City! Time to make a new life for myself

God... I'll never be as happy as them.

Had a dream that a lady I've liked for a while sent me like two slightly flirty messages on Discord. I really ought to be a little more ambitious than that

Okay, I'll bite - Why is it late right now

"As they say, desperate times call for desperate measures... and I am fuckin' DESPERATE to MEASURE TIME!" - Clock Inventor, inventor of, among other things, nominative determinism

My New Doohickey

--FIRST DAY LIVING TOGETHER-- The Completionist: Just did the dishes The Achievement Hunter: dude FUCK you

having a mid life crisis which i believe is a type of crisis you have when your life is mid

I don't love myself enough to be trusted to make decisions that benefit me.

--INCOMING TRANSMISSION FROM PINK BABE PLANET-- Pink Babe: We are the Pink Babes. There are no males on this planet, and you have to come lay us so we can survive Me: Hold the phone BIG lady (215cm average) I'm receiving a transmission from Blue Babe Planet Blue Babe: Help us! There are no men on ou

Space is so flipping awesome. I'm going to train to become an astronaut so I can visit planets full of pink babes, green babes, blue babes, etc.

All my sidequests are wrapping up, and soon, my true purpose will become clear to me. Everyone is jealous of me for this

I feel like I could easily have more bottom dysphoria than I think I do. I should probably have 10× as much sex as I do so I can figure it out

yea whatever my bad

guy who is still not over kindergarten gf: We used to ride the seesaw and you was always in the air because i was heavier do you remember