Mr M

I'm very rarely late, in fact I'm normally 5 or 10 minutes early. Which means I have to wait at least half an hour on my own for anyone else to turn up. The trouble with being prompt is there's never anyone else there to see it.

Don't forget to return your unwanted leaflets . . .

A neighbour of mine has just been accused of being a conspiracy theorist while dropping her kids off at school. "Oh ....... I didn't know you were one of those conspiracy people" "Eh?" She was wearing a Becky Hill tour hoodie 😂

A quick who's who.

Do not laugh . .

My daughter's new favourite song, on repeat for the last hour . .. music.youtube.com/watch?v=BDvO...

Mother-in-law - you've got such a lovely thoughtful (13 year old) daughter Me - thanks, she's an angel. Mother-in-law - yeah, shame my daughter was a demented demon at that age. Me - 😬

Two 80 year old celebrities die and neither of them were Trump. WTAF

These two trying to make it look like our garden is a crusty dry desert. . . .

Reform Ratioed . . .

Absolutely definitely not a dictator 😬🫣

Goes without saying

Just when you thought it couldn't get any weirder.

Telling the outside world you have no contact with the outside world . .. 🤔

. . .but the electorate is . .

Just been sent this from a Spanish (ex) friend . . .. Vuelve a casa, vuelve a casa Ya llega, el fútbol vuelve a casa Vuelve a casa, vuelve a casa Ya llega, el fútbol vuelve a casa

Either extremely intellectual irony or absurdly moronic.

My beautiful loving daughter has woken up this morning grumpy, uncommunicative and stroppy. Happy 13th birthday A.

Reform - a history of bribery in one picture.

My daughter becomes a teenager in 5 days. I asked what she wanted to do on her birthday . . "Just get your affairs in order"

Mrs M - We're going to have a teenage daughter in 11 days . . Me -

One for the "Christians"

Classic

More irony than I could handle. I had to take it on the chin . ..

Miss M's thought for the day. "It's like the devil's anus out there"

This guy's demanding an election . . .