GUI Vuitton

(It was sex)

The number one management trick for making your employees feel seen without ever seeing them: Idk just ignore them

Born to say: So this is actually called scrolljacking and it's universally hated by users and the fact that you don't know or don't care about that makes it clear you're bad at your job. Cursed to say: Looks good :)

Craziest thing I’ve ever seen I woke up this morning and was suddenly dripping from the wrist??

Nothing in the US will ever be nice and new again. Nothing that’s new is ever nice and everything that used to be nice is no longer nice. The empire has literally already fallen and we’re just watching the roads go longer and longer without repair.

Honestly can’t understand people who don’t always expect the worst. Like what you just wake up and expect everything to be okay? Are you fucking insane?

At my first football game and now I know for sure like 100% of the crowd noise you hear on TV is fake not one god damn person out here chanting defense

Tower of Babel story proves god is a pussy and afraid of us we can get him if we work together

Season 2 of Chad Powers is some of the most beautiful television I’ve ever seen.

Sam Jackson in Cap 1 commercials: “what’s in your wallet? 😁” Shaq in Credit One commercials: “I’m fucking your wife 🧍‍♂️”

My billion dollar idea: A smog check place that doesn't fuck you

When you eat a formerly safe food for the first time in a long time and find that it’s once again safe

“all you do is hang out at home” yeah no shit I live there????

I wake up. I go on the machine that shows me the infinite stream of stupid people. I watch them until I get mad. I continue watching them, making myself upset for no pay, no benefit, no single solitary positive reason. I hit the time limit. I ignore limit for the day.

Music player that lets you tag plays as ironic

imo people be leaning on Hanlon's Razor WAY too much because it makes them feel superior. "Republicans aren't malicious they're just soooooo stupid" like dude 2 things can be true

saw a comedian getting heckled for wearing a suit vest and didn't do anything to stop it because I also think suit vest no suit makes you look like a theater employee

A Stanford prison experiment hate to see me coming I am NOT good at slotting into expected societal roles

I think one of my least favorite genres of people are the ones at work who think I need more information when I'm told i have to do something. Like, no I don't actually need any of this reasoning, I didn't do it because I didn't want to not because I didn't understand.

One of the things people like to razz Plan 9 from Outer Space about is how Criswell talks about the events in the past tense before the movie, but in the future tense after the movie, when in fact REAL ONES know he's ACTUALLY using Future Perfect Tense at the beginning of the movie.

My wife and I are looking for ways to make our own vintage cardboard Halloween decorations and today I tried making one with jelly print but I accidentally made La Creatura

I straight up always be ignoring limit for rest of day

Insane defensive positioning from partsgeek's return form leads me to believe they probably send the wrong parts all the time and don't like people getting the parts they actually ordered.

League of Legends feels to me a lot like Dick's Last Resort or something like that. Like, you know people are gonna tell you to kill yourself but that's kind of part of the fun?

You think THAT’s kindness? I got news for you buddy, REAL kindness is <describes cruelty>

Spirit Halloween has very few decorations this year it’s all just costumes and I feel like that’s a recession indicator. We no longer have houses to decorate just parties to go to

Yesterday me and some friends accidentally smoked evil weed and got too high and then thps4 glitched such that our character got stuck and cut in half and couldn’t move or get up and I thought he was dead and started feeling like I was in a creepypasta like DEAD_HAWK or some shit

I read the love languages book because I've been hearing references to it for years and I really only learned about it from cultural osmosis, and holy shit if this book helped you I'm glad but this is some of the lamest christcuck boomerslop I've ever read.

Owning a classic car is 99% going "I shouldn't need a specialty tool for this" and slamming your head against the wall for a few hours and 1% giving in and buying the specialty tool and fixing the problem in 20 seconds.

Me sowing: hahaha yesssss yessss 😈 Me reaping: YESSSS! 😈😈😈 (I am reaping the fruits of my labor! I was also happy while sowing because I understood that, though delayed, the gratification would be of a higher degree)

“Oh my god that dude is so weird can you believe he <description of a pretty normal hobby>”

Like sure it’s a one hit wonder but you can’t deny that the range of emotions felt between listening to Unwritten aspirationally versus listening to it celebratorally is enough to make it one of the songs of all time.