Putin’s Double

Trump’s chance of getting a Nobel prize now is about the same as Hitler getting one posthumously.

'Like President Zelenskyy, We Will Not Bow to the Bully Messiah' FULL POST: johnpavlovitz.substack.com/p/like-presi...

Tomorrow’s speech to congress will be simulcast in Russian.

Just remember, every Republican in Congress is directly responsible for everything that’s happening right now. They voted to make it all happen.

My boys make me proud. They’re proud boys. #Krasnov #Guyliner

His FSB Code name: “Guyliner”

Somebody needs to bring out the old film of Roosevelt yelling at the Jews for not making peace with Hitler.

Trump’s Russian asset code-name is “Krasnov”. What’s Elon’s? Tucker’s? Give up? Elon’s is “Otets” which means father—that’s because he has 11 kids! Tucker’s used to be “bow tie” for his unfortunate fashion past. Now, it’s “cock-holster” for obvious reasons.

KGB asset Krasnov was given the order to surrender Ukraine in any way possible without disclosing he is a Russian asset. His other mission was to use lies to sow division and discontent within America and between its allies.

I love my little Krasnov. Such a prolific liar!

Little Krasnov rapes the flag!

The new USSA will be led by this dynamic duo!

Me with little Krasnov!

TRUMP: “Russia has the cards in peace negotiations and not just because I’m the world’s worst negotiator. I’m also totally on Russia’s side. Partly because Zelenskyy got me impeached but mostly because of all the money Putin gave me.” That sums it up.

TRUMP: “Russia will always hold all the cards in any negotiation I’m part of. This whole thing would have been over in three days if I’d been president. I would have surrendered before it all began. I’d have killed Zelenskyy myself if needed.

Trump is the bizarro version of the US leader. Wwitched sides in WW2 to bail Hitler out of his Berlin troubles.

Nobody but Trump is this terrible at negotiating. He really is in a class by himself. At least among humans. Probably there are chimps or dogs who could do worse.

With zero percent of the votes counted in this completely fair and not rigged election, I would like to congratulate LUKASHENKA on his projected victory!

Elon and I have similar views on free speech.

Shit’s about to get real when Smith report tells Americans about Agent Orange’s traitorous activities! Can Elon keep his job if Trump loses his?

I am having painful gas problems.

Satan is with us, we’re Russia.

“This year, I’d like to send my most sincere nuclear threats to our enemies all around the world!” -Dmitry Medvedev

I won’t be negotiating with Trump’s envoy but rather have demanded to meet him in person. Together, we will watch a little movie about peepee.

See? Record number of dead Russians but they’re not bored!

Good job today, right? I think I did a great job convincing everyone Russia has zero problems and I am definitely not a psychopath!

“If I’m not sacrificing 16,000 Russkies per day, I get bored.” - Putin

Warm day in Moscow!

I’m busy these day! Apparently they think fake Putin is better than no Putin or dead Putin.

Russians must be prepared to sacrifice if they want to avoid seeing their president humiliated.

If any other countries like Syria reject my international puppet show, I’m gonna to need more than a bullet-proof vest. Might have to borrow the Vatican Pope-mobile.

The nerve of these Georgians. They act like they’re their own country.

Syria and Georgia shouldn’t be such troublemakers. I mean neither were losing 43,000 per month in meat waves.

One of my young sons told another boy to give him his lunch money. The other boy said “why?” My son said “You have to, it’s a Special Lunchroom Operation. If he didn’t give up the money, this escalation would start World War 3. The other little boy was so scared, he peed his pants. So cute!

I am now making an average of 1400 nuclear threats each day—one for every Russian casualty. So don’t say I don’t care about you Russians (I don’t care about you Russians).

We keep propping up the ruble and it keeps falling down. Again don’t worry about me, my money’s in euros, dollars and Venezuelan Bolivars

For those who have asked, don’t worry. None of my money is tied up in the crashing ruble. I would never make that mistake. It’s all in dollars, euros and real estate. Plus I own Trump.

Nothing Trump does makes sense unless you ask “WWPW?” “What Would Putin Want?”

Holding the world blackmail to nuclear attack works on Joe Rogan and his Rogees.

Two things will result in execution: bringing me bad news and telling me lies. This is how I guarantee success.

Just realized it’s been like 35 minutes since my last nuclear threat, so…

I don’t understand why Solovyov and neither of his sons have volunteered for the man-mulcher (Ukraine). The way he shamed all the other Russians, you’d never imagine him as both a hypocrite and a coward.

I used to think the worst way to go out is like Gaddafi, but now I’m wondering if Romanov-style might be even worse than that?

Okay, now that you’ve crossed off Gaetz, please stay away from my girlfriend Tulsi! She’s more loyal to me than most of the Kremlin.

If you read the fine print in Russia’s new nuclear doctrin , it says we reserve the right to target popular tourist destinations like LA’s Santa Monica Pier. Here is what it looks like during WW3.

Nuclear threat du jour: Hollywood!

Today’s nuclear threat of the day: Aunt Jemima! Take this, you decadent, un-PC creator of western deliciousness!

I’m publishing a “Threat of the Day” calendar. Today’s threat is (once again) a nuclear one. Disneyland during World War 3! Remember this when approving Ukraine’s shooting missiles into Russia.

I never did like his dancing.