Rick Gualtieri

Rick Gualtieri

@rickgualtieri.com

Writer of horror and comedy. Over 50 titles to entertain you as the world burns. Dog & cat dad. Fan of cryptids, Transformers, & Godzilla. NJ dweller. He/Him. Check out my books at: https://rickgualtieri.com/links/

2.1K followers1K following6K posts

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

JFC, you literally can't do anything on ACX's website without that goddamned Virtual Voice notice popping up in your face on almost every fucking page. And of course the "No fucking way!" button is labeled, "I'll do this later." Because big companies refuse to take no for an answer.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Picked up this razor off Amazon for $15 on Prime Day, thinking worst case it didn’t cost much. Holy crap. This is by far the best head shaver I’ve ever owned. Fast, cuts close, and I’ve been using it for over a month and only charged it once. Anyway, that’s it. That’s the post. 😁

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

I swear, the number of insufferable “Halloween is Satanic!” posts this year are off the charts. Sorry, but if you think little Timmy with his Power Rangers costume and bag of candy is satanic, but haven’t said shit about the rapist pedo in the White House then you and your opinions can get fucked.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Had some AI scammer approach me yesterday offering to make me new covers for all my books for $9 apiece. So, on the upside, the clankers are now racing each other to the bottom. 🤣

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Every so often I like to revisit my book blurbs to see if they need updating. Usually, I’ll rewrite one, love it, but there will be one line I don’t like but can’t think of a good rewording. So, I’ll push it live to all my various places...

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Then, without fail, a day or two later the perfect fix for said line will hit me, requiring me to update everything a second freaking time. Patience is a virtue … one I apparently don’t have. 🤣

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Guessing my phone number made it to some list because so far today I’ve gotten texts to refinance my mortgage, install solar panels, trim my trees, and buy my home.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Bought some salmon dog food for the puppers. Was prepping their breakfast today, turned away for a second, then turned back to find Toby the cat happily munching away on it. Cat tax below.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Sometimes the best thing you can do for your author sanity is acknowledge your books aren’t for everyone, and stop trying to appease those readers who are obviously not part of your core audience.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Maybe it's just me, but I like morally complex characters, and by that I mean ones who don't always do or say the right thing. Heck, sometimes they might even do something terrible. That's fine so long as the story justifies it and I don't completely loathe them...

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

It's okay if there's some parts of them I don't like. I don't need every character to be a template for my ideal. Flaws sometimes lead to growth. And even when they don't, it can make for an interesting 3-dimensional character. Real life is messy. I'm okay if fiction is too.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

So, Amazon Attribution links sometimes take a while to populate. That said, I'm seeing a MAJOR disparity in reporting between clicks from FB ads vs actual page views on Amazon - telling me something is standing in the way...

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Either it's Meta putting up their "Are you sure you want to leave FB?" bs warning, or it's Amazon's Captcha catching bots - which is infinitely more worrisome because it suggests very little of the traffic coming from FB right now is real.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

So, I ran a weeklong test of nothing but FB sales ads, to get a baseline. Starting a weeklong test of nothing but FB traffic ads. Same creative and audience, but different Ad type. So, I have clean data to compare. As for why...

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Sales are supposed to, in theory, provide a "higher quality" of audience, i.e. those more likely to buy. But the tradeoff is they cost more. Whereas Traffic ads will sent a ton more traffic to your links at a greatly reduced cost. Caveat, they're mostly lookyloos (again in theory)...

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

The fear of course in traffic ads being how many of those cheap clicks are FB bots and not real people. Anyway, the test is "quality" vs "velocity" to see if one holds vs the other.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

We should all make it a habit of dropping a like on any book ad we see, even if it's not our preferred genre, so long as it's clearly not AI generated. Help train the algorithm that real readers want to see real books.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Another "joyous" call with the mortgage company as they keep sending me texts informing me they're paying property taxes that have already been paid.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Only a little over a thousand words this am. The lounge I usually park myself in on Thursdays is all high glass windows. So on warm sunny days it heats up like a terrarium. Alas, the words do not flow as well when I feel like Ace Ventura in a rhino suit. 🤣

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

It cannot be stressed enough: if you have a child who has come out to you with regards to either transitioning or their sexual orientation and that caused you to reject them, you are in fact both a terrible parent and an awful human being. 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

I think lots of authors have that one character they’re super proud of creating, that would cause the rest of the world to give a collective, “the fuck, dude?”

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

For all the things there are to talk about in the original Hellraiser, it’s often overlooked that Frank was apparently such a good fuck, he was able to turn his brother’s innocent fiancée evil just by the power of his bad boy D.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Was bouncing ad ideas off Alissa. She doesn’t read my genres, but her feedback has definitely given me new roads to consider traveling down. This rabbit hole might go deep, but so far Oct sales / reads suck, so probably a perfect time to go on this journey.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

So Alissa ate my cream puff last week and this week Rai ate the fruit sando I was saving. I’m feeling kinda like a victim of pastry neglect here.

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Our dog Falkor has always been the type who only eats if he’s hungry. If he’s not, he’ll walk away. Even as a puppy he did this. That said, it gets a little nerve wracking now that he’s getting up in years…

Rick Gualtieri
@rickgualtieri.com

Some nights he won’t want his dinner and we’ll be all, is this it? Is something wrong? Only for him the next morning to be all, “Okay, hungry again. Where’s breakfast?”