Rob Ackerman

All material provided by an unrepentant gangster who deserves what’s about to happen to him.

Jack Smith needs to become a verb. “Let’s Jack Smith some of the false claims about vaccine protocols and climate change.” His calm, cool crushing of a ranting Republican accuser was a marvel to behold.

A man who loves cameras and needs cameras decides to ban cameras.

Why he’s trying to muzzle the press: youtube.com/shorts/luTny...

Every place, ultimately, is a small town. But whenever I go back to the small-town part of the world where I used to live and immediately run into someone who's known me since forever, I cherish actual small towns all over again.

U.S. Military To Test Troops’ Testosterone Levels https://theonion.com/u-s-military-to-test-troops-testosterone-levels/

Btw, if a man pulls his tee shirt over his face, he is crying.

“The White House is not a business opportunity. The presidency is not a license to steal from the American people. The government of the United States doesn’t exist to make Donald Trump rich. It belongs to the American people.” —Chris Murphy

Nobody sees what I say on this platform, so it’s like a little private diary.

So the president has raked in two billion American dollars during his second term, so far. Move over Charlie Forbes, Harry Dougherty and Al Fall. This thief is showing the amateurs of the Harding administration how it’s done.

A partial eclipse

Nothing is the president’s fault, and he has never made a mistake in his life or had any reason to apologize because he’s perfect

A Black man with the surname Freeman scored for the USA on Juneteenth in a home World Cup match.

I have left all other pursuits to watch highlights of the Knicks finals wins.

This was a phenomenal piece of writing. For those of us who weren't there, this is probably the closest we can get.

Sports writing does not just allow hyperbole, it requires and relishes it.

Does this signal the end of everything?

Voting is a right, not a privilege. The SAVE Act won’t save anything. It will strip Americans of their right to vote. We have to fight back to protect our democracy.

Art is a thing done well.

Two can, toucan.

Funding for everything around you is being cut daily but this administration, but somehow Trump wants you to be OK with him stealing your tax dollars to pay his January 6 insurrectionists.

And what are you up to?

If anyone tries to tell you that the United States was founded as a Christian nation, ask them how many times the word God appears in the Constitution.

Oops, my bad.

Yes, it’s overpriced, but it’ll also be tacky.

In history class, I never understood how “advanced” civilizations could collapse. It just didn’t seem plausible. Anyway, I’ve seen enough. I get it now.

Arrogance to achievement ratio approaches infinity www.nytimes.com/2026/04/14/u...

Lighten up, everyone; it’s totally normal for a president to play Jesus and gaslight people by saying he was playing doctor while threatening to destroy a civilization and manipulating the stock market.

Child: I know your name. Mamdani. Obama: What’s his first name? Child: Mayor.

Paradoxically.

Thank you, Shakespeare.

Anyone else notice this? Mainstream journalists have forgotten their duty to speak truth to power. It is why it is one of the rights written into the Constitution. Political cartoonists are the real and true heroes of the moment.

These upbeat vandals.

“Power does not grow out of the barrel of a gun, cruelty is not the same as strength, and a politics built on such ideas promises ruin, delusion about the limits of our power and a betrayal of the promise of our founding.” www.nytimes.com/2026/03/22/o...

A century from now, the current president will be remembered just as frequently and fondly as Warren Gamaliel Harding, and his name will be emblazoned on the same number of nothings.

After a lot of feedback from friends and family, I’ve decided to halt my nuclear enrichment program

ICE brought chaos to our streets. Instead of focusing on violent criminals, they pulled over off-duty local law enforcement officers.

Fact: In a one hour and 47 minute speech, the President only spent 2.9 minutes on affordability and 3.8 minutes on health care.

Writing fiction is the exact opposite of a get-rich-quick scheme.

First they came for my neighbor and I was like damn that’s crazy. Then they came for me and I was like Ah shit shit shit shit fuck

Thank you, Mexico.

My phrenologist gave me a note for school that says I won’t be able to understand math class

Seriously?

Grace. Respect. Love.

Full Bad Bunny speech

We do NOT have a right to bear arms. Thank you for your attention to this matter.