Ryan Lohner (he/him)

I've been advised that artists of all kinds should keep a link to their work pinned here, so here you go. www.amazon.com/Place-Beyond...

Wildwood may be my new choice for the best movie of 2026, holy shit. Incredibly rough in a very old school '80s way, but it's all fully earned by the story so it doesn't come off like a try-hard edgelord.

Bolsonaro right now.

James Gunn continues to be awesome.

It’s become a popular joke that our entire concept of what various ages are supposed to look like are completely fucked because of all the lead that used to be poisoning us. So now everyone gets constantly told how young they look for their age.

Everything I said about Crystal Lake freaking me out despite my strong stomach for gore? That goes double for Clayface. And I loved it so much.

My favorite tidbit about him: Robert Redford really wanted him to play the father in Ordinary People, but he turned it down on the advice of his agent. Then 30 years later, he played Timothy Hutton's father in Leverage.

If Season 2 of Carrie is going to continue to spread out into Stephen King land, and Flanagan wants to keeps Samantha Sloyan on, there's a certain other role I can really see her fitting...

Announcing this on Clayface’s release day is a really special win for Flanagan.

Diminish an anime Legend of Neighborhood Heroes

In Zoolander, Ben Stiller forgot his next line and tried to restart the scene by repeating "But why male models?" Then David Duchovny responded to it in character, and they decided it fit him enough to keep in.

So...it was legal until now?

MST3K predicted Richard Linklater's Boyhood.

Between Widow’s Bay and Crystal Lake, Hamish Linklater seems to suddenly be the go-to guy for playing quietly sinister, gaslighting husbands in horror stories. I’d guess it’s springboarding off Midnight Mass.

Anyone calling this show a Surf Dracula has very obviously not seen it, just as much as anyone saying Netflix’s East of Eden makes Cathy a “girlboss.” Every episode has at least one insane gore effect that really made me queasy, after I got through all of Saw without ever looking away.

Crystal Lake is absolutely bringing the goods. I’ve developed a pretty hard stomach for gore, and was able to get through every Saw movie without looking away, but there’s one bit in the first episode that really got to me.

I was warned about a lot of stuff in The Help, but no one told me how many major scenes are centered around people on the toilet. The movie’s enough of a slog, I really don’t need the writer’s poorly disguised fetish on top of it.

Not using references is why this happened.

Not that MASH ever made much pretense about really being set in Vietnam, but one episode has Radar showing his comic collection and pretty much all of them are from after 1952.

Alejandro Inarritu signing up to make Digger at Warner Brothers:

You know what else Larry McMurtry wrote besides Lonesome Dove? Terms of Endearment. Yes, the most famous “chick flick” ever made, where Shirley MacLaine runs around screaming about a shot.

Watching my nephew and niece get just as into Sting of Death as I was into OG MST3K at that age:

Age yourself with a childhood crush