Spinal Tap Quotes

PSA: @spinaltapquotes.bsky.social used to have quotes from one Spinal Tap film. It now has quotes from two Spinal Tap films. We hope this puts an end to the speculation.

MARTY: Do you miss playing music? NIGEL: I play music. MARTY: Where? NIGEL: At a pub. [Celtic music playing] [plays heavy rock note]

IAN: Good heavens. How are you, laddy?! Great to see you, Ter! Terrific to see you. TERRY: Uhhhhm...Liam! IAN: Ian. Ian.

MARTY: You play to predominantly, uh predominantly a white audience, you feel your music is racist in any way? DAVID: No! NIGEL: No, no, of course not...

NIGEL: This is exact... my exact inner structure, done in a T-shirt. Exactly, medically accurate, see.

DAVID: Have you seen Duke Fame's current album? IAN: Um... yes, yes. DAVID: Have you seen the cover?

♪ And that's the Majesty of Rock ♪ ♪ The Mystery of Roll ♪ ♪ The darning of the sock ♪ ♪ The scoring of the goal ♪

♪ There's a demon in my belly ♪ ♪ And a gremlin in my brain ♪

♪ Your face is okay But your purse is too tight (gimme some money, gimme some money) ♪ ♪ I'm looking for pound notes, loose change, bad checks, anything ♪ ♪ Gimme some money, gimme some money ♪

DAVID: It's not going to say anything? IAN: No, it's not going to say anything.

MARTY: What was he the saint of? DAVID: He was the patron saint of quality footwear.

DEREK: We're very lucky in the sense that we've got two visionaries in the band. MARTY: Right.

JEANINE: We are going to the Air Force base. NIGEL: Why are we going to an Air Force base?

MARTY: How do you suppose a girl grows up becoming a drummer? Because it's not natural. It doesn't...

PROMOTER: I'm thinking documentaries, a huge memorial concert. DAVID: You can do that without actually killing one of us, though. PROMOTER: It's difficult to do a memorial concert when the person's alive. That's a sort of rule of thumb.

MARTY: So, let's say... NIGEL:Sometimes it's the opposite. Sometimes people come in with cheese. MARTY: Yeah. NIGEL: It goes both ways.

DEREK: What kind of experimenting? What they got monkeys opening it or what?

DRIVER: But it's...it's a passing thing...it's uh... I mean I would never tell them this but this is uh...this is a fad.

DAVID: Great look, good drummer. NIGEL: Good, good drummer... DAVID: Fine drummer... MARTY: What happened to him? DAVID: He died.

♪ Working on a sex farm, Trying to raise some hard love, Getting out my pitch fork, Poking your hay ♪

MARTY: How long have you been running this glue museum? DEREK: Glue had always been something that fascinated me.

MARTY: Oh. Oh, Jesus. Are you choking? All right. All right. Here. Come on. Heimlich. Here we go. Here we go. Okay. One more. Okay. [grunts] [rock music playing]

DAVID: Whatever you did, I forgive you. NIGEL: I didn't do anything. DAVID: Well, then I forgive you for that.

ARTIST: You got it.

what's stoppin' it and what's behind what's stoppin' it, so what's the end, you know,

NIGEL: Well, I don't know, wh-wh-what are the hours? THE END

DAVID: I do not, for one, think that the problem was that the band was down. I think that the problem may have been... that there was a Stonehenge monument on the stage that was in danger of being crushed by a dwarf.

♪ And the people stood and stared ♪ ♪ Loved us more than we had dared to, in America ♪

DEREK: Listen. CROWD: Tap! Tap! Tap... DAVID: Shit. DEREK: Let's not lose it though! Let's not lose it...Where the fuck is Ian? You know he should be here. CROWD: Tap! Tap! Tap... DEREK: We got to get to it someway. We've been on stage right?

VIV: I've got some of this Mendocino Rocket Fuel, that's supposed to be really..... DAVID: Can you play...excuse me, Viv, can you play a bassline, uh, like Nigel used to do on "Big Bottom", can you double that? You recall the lines in fifths? VIV: Oh, yeah. I've got two hands

<Back outside the venue> ROADIE: Watch it now, watch it now.

NIGEL: Well don't point, even. MARTY: Don't even point? NIGEL: No. It can't be played...never...

♪ You're a beauty ♪ ♪ You're the best of your breed ♪ ♪ You're a handful ♪ ♪ And I know what you need ♪

...on the bass: Derek Smalls, he wrote this....

ARTIE: I love you, Nigel Tufnel.

Cause Frank calls the shots for all of those guys.

<Sound check, Shank Hall, Milwuakee, Wisconsin> NIGEL: Hello, hello, hello, hello DAVID: Testin', test, test, test, test "This is mike number one, this is mike number one, isn't this a lot of fun?" NIGEL: Two, two.

♪ Here she comes, that rainy day sun ♪ ♪ Peeking in and out the falling raindrops ♪ ♪ Smiling down on everyone ♪

DAVID: This is unbelievable! This is unbelievable! NIGEL: No, it's not unbelievable at all...it all leads up to this...it all leads up to this. DAVID: This is unbelieveable. Will you check me on this, am I losing my fucking mind? Could you check me on this, am I losing my mind?

DRIVER: You know, it's just that people like this...you know... they get all they want so they don't really understand, you know...about a life like Frank's.

IAN: We shoulda thought of that... DAVID: We were so close... IAN: I mean if we had all you guys tied up, that probably woulda been fine. ALL: Ah... IAN: But it's...it's still a stupid cover. DAVID: It's such a fine line between stupid an'... DEREK: ...and clever.

♪ Stonehenge - 'tis a magic place ♪ ♪ Where the moon doth rise ♪ ♪ With a dragon's face ♪ ♪ Stonehenge - where the virgins lie ♪ ♪ And the prayer of devils ♪ ♪ Fills the midnight sky ♪

♪ When we die, do we haunt the sky? ♪ ♪ Do we lurk in the murk of the seas? ♪

♪ Losing is for losers, and winners play to win ♪ ♪ Always love the sinner, you may even like the sin ♪

we are such fans of your music, and all of your records. DEREK: That's great HOOKSTRATTEN: I am not speaking of yours personally, but the whole genre of the rock and roll... DAVID: I can understand that. DEREK: It's a great genre.

BOBBI: Viv, come over here...everybody. IAN: Bobbi Flekman. DEREK: Who is it ...with the record company? BOBBI: Yes, Bobbi Flekman - the hostess with the mostest

IAN: This looks absolutely perfect. I mean it's, uh, the right proportions. It'll be this color right? ARTIST: Yeah. Yeah.

ARTIE: Polymer Records, how are you, hey, how ya doin' you are ...Derek? DEREK: Derek, Yeah.

FAN 3: The way they dress, the leather.