Stephen Collins

13 Nov 2025

Every ad now

What’s that you say? Liz has a new book out which even the Telegraph is saying is even more unhinged than the last one? Wonderful, I’ll post this then.

The 'Narrator About to Ruin Your Audiobook Book' Talent Agency (Prints of this one and many others available in my shop! Link in bio)

Prints available in my shop of this one from last year. The perfect Christmas gift for the philosophically-inclined office wall . Limited edition, numbered and signed giclee art print - link to shop in bio. #philosophy

theguardian.comThe best thing since sliced bread? The Stephen Collins cartoonBirds of a feather …

Microbe first contact

The social theatrics of Graham Norton's sofa is so fascinating, it makes you feel like a scientific researcher looking through the glass. Absolute genius telly

"let's take elevated celebrity figures and make them into subjects of study, with the viewer in the role of researcher" is the best ever innovation in chat shows ever, and only Norton can pull it off

If we're supposedly in the 'age of authenticity' or whatever then celebrity traitors is the perfect show for it. Seeing James Acaster turn from loveable ironic funnyman into haunted automaton cos he has to lie just makes me love him more

Stephen Collins reposted

Rick Burin

@rickburin.bsky.social

Reminded today of this all-timer from the early days of The Internet

theguardian.comOn a planet far, far away … the Stephen Collins cartoonProbing questions …

I asked you your favourite biscuit and you said 'oh a hob nob' or 'digestive' or 'bourbon' and you thought it would make me think you authentic and real but you should have said 'the poshest ones I can find for the posh ones are the best' as that is the truth you hide and now I know you are a coward

The best ones are the ones you are ashamed to admit they say 'simply delectable' or 'the finest' or something equally cunty on the packet and there are four of them for £15 and they have more packaging than an emergency couriered replacement heart

Got a fine from a car park so egregious it is famous as Britain's Cuntiest Car Park and part of me feels a bit special for getting caught by the apex car park cunts. Got got by the best!

Basically they've bought the tiny car park between a McDonald's and a Starbucks, right: then cut it in two and made Extremely Mental Rules about how if you park in McDs you CANNOT get a coffee from Starbucks and vice versa, even if you visit both! They literally scour the cctv for transgressors

Got a fine from a car park so egregious it is famous as Britain's Cuntiest Car Park and part of me feels a bit special for getting caught by the apex car park cunts. Got got by the best!

www.theguardian.com/money/2018/n...

theguardian.comIs this Britain’s most ridiculous parking fine?Shoppers were charged £60 after parking outside Starbucks but going next door to McDonald’s in the same Stansted park

Got a fine from a car park so egregious it is famous as Britain's Cuntiest Car Park and part of me feels a bit special for getting caught by the apex car park cunts. Got got by the best!

Any other alumni out there of the Stanstead 'McDonald's-Starbucks' scam? They've been getting away with it for years

Street Dance With Mark Zuckerberg

If there's one groups in society who NEED to stop using AI to make resources, slides, posters, it's teachers. You're literally showing your students that you used AI to do your own homework. You look like a moron. It's shameful. Do not do this.

Also bad messaging: throwing around the word 'moron' when you want to convince people of something. To be clear: I'm not saying the teachers who do this are morons. Yes, the workload is absurd. But AI messaging in schools /

(a) tells the kids it's OK to use AI to shortcut work they find annoying, or hard, or too much, and (b) tells their parents you haven't reflected on whether this is a good thing to tell their kids. This is not some high-minded 'save the graphic designers' pitch. It's a messaging triple-fail

Just seen a poster for my local school illustrated with a made-up AI school cartoon and yikes, I'm glad I took my kids out of there.

Advertising *anything* with an AI poster screams "we have no brains and probably something to hide" but when it's for a school it's just an absolute pile of WHAT the HELL are you DOING my GOD

theguardian.comMark Zuckerberg is leading us a merry dance: the Stephen Collins cartoonWhatever next …

theguardian.comUnlikely revolutionary Mr Rogers will lead the uprising: the Stephen Collins cartoonWhere’s Fred Rogers when you need him?

Stephen Collins reposted

The Author, Séamas O'Reilly

@seamas.bsky.social

If you're in my GP's office any time soon, prepare yourself for what many are calling the greatest mnemonic of all time. Come for E and P, but sit down and clap for I.

Omg I'm crying with laughter Richard e grant and jerri hall are gold on this #celebritytraitors

Gets funnier the more you look at it

Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg@theradr.bsky.social

the only map of england everybody else needs (best selling music by territory, Actually Helpful for understanding some things; also Suck It Morrissey.)

Yup getting on for 15 minutes now and I am not able to stop intermittently laughing out loud about the brutal territorial dominance of Beth Orton

Gets funnier the more you look at it

Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg@theradr.bsky.social

the only map of england everybody else needs (best selling music by territory, Actually Helpful for understanding some things; also Suck It Morrissey.)

This is also why the Champions League makes no sense

If this scenario ends up being true it's going to be my second favourite story of the year after Chappell Roan's self-manifesting bodyguard

AndyInBrum@andyinbrum.bsky.social

It’s going to end up that they’re going to be a bunch of scotes who were going round nicking fertiliser and farm stuff and hadn’t realised how close to the air base they were

The worst part of being American is that they will never truly know the joy of Alan Partridge

Phil Lewis@phillewis.bsky.social

Here’s The New York Times 100 Best TV Shows of the 21st Century: www.nytimes.com/interactive/...

Ive always felt like The Office (uk) was a way of repackaging what was invented with I'm Alan Partridge 1 & 2, for a wider audience

I mean I know IAP was 90s but it was easily, easily the most revolutionary comedy moment of the last 40 years and the whole strand has just got better with each revisiting

In 1996 Mel B said 'your trumpet's blowing for far too long, climbing the snake of the ladder but you're wrong' and I think enough time has passed now to ask Mel what she meant by this

theguardian.comAI psychosis for dummies: the Stephen Collins cartoonNot everything is fake, it turns out

I mean I know this is a bit punching-down but I feel like, if you are a neurotypical, completely delusion-free adult, and you regularly respond to any Clearly-Not-AI-Why_On-Earth-Would-This-Possibly-Be-AI thing with "this is AI 🙄" then, no: Jail. Sorry. You're in jail now. Stop being thick.

#TBT to this from 2012 in honour of Michael Gove starring as an invasion-battling leader in Sky's new show The Wargame. If you don't know what or who this comic is about... just count yourself lucky and scroll on, no worries.

*The drawings look different from what I do now, because this was very early on in my comic-making days when I was still working out how to basically squeeze a comedy sketch into a comic strip format

This was one of the first ones where I thought oh yeah, this could actually work, if I keep it down to 12 panels and just skip between politics and observational/life stuff

20 Sept

So we watched Big with the kids tonight, and I haven't seen it since I was their age, 10-12 - and god it's a different perspective... But my god what a MASTERPIECE

View full thread

And the lady was not such a jolly nonce as I'd feared. Soon as she knows the truth, she shuts that shit down. Twenty-something tom cruise is HOT though, who knew

*HANKS

So we watched Big with the kids tonight, and I haven't seen it since I was their age, 10-12 - and god it's a different perspective... But my god what a MASTERPIECE