tbsheets.bsky.social

Stop lying about my Canadian girlfriend or else face the wrath of my Chinese lawyer.

I

There is a song lyric I just can’t remember

an unsolicited dick pic but with Halloween snap bracelets?

I did not reply guy this photo to a post about pickles.

I’d like to Make A Sand art terrarium But with everything bagel spice

MAGA believes the check is in the mail

I can fix her.

I recall a time when handheld calculators were going to be the ruin of the Today’s Youth. Initially, this was a chuckle, but has since turned introspective.

…an entire island of Jamesarus Bondi…

That’s weird. I wasn’t horny yesterday.

PROTIP: 1) Pay for sex at least once 2) Think of how much money you just saved after you masturbate 3) PROFIT

Called boss. Said I’m going to Mitch work today.

Choose Own Adventure/Netflix True Crime series kit

I’m tired. **drinks Celsius** I’m tired & my ears are ringing.

Will this be on the test?

Jail? Disneyland? Don’t leave me hanging!

CBD/tHC/cyclobenzaprune/Josh Red music.youtube.com/watch?v=h1U2...

Combo Uber and Lawn Green. Gig worker brings sod to your home so you can touch grass while remaining inside. And tacos 🌮 🌮🌮

I was getting lower wacker cocky and lower wacker slapped me down.

I talked to @mitchmcconell.bsky.social for 20 minutes today. You should stop shaming him because of complications in chin augmentation surgery.

I

ANTIFA has ☢️ WPDs☢️ Weapons of Pool Destruction

Saturday night and the only one sliding into my DMs is CVS.

horny 4 Bernoulli

I spoke up in a division wide meeting. I’m going to need the rest of the day off to recover now.

Isn’t that just like a meat sac? Brings an organ to a robot knife fight.

I have orders to take a Fleets enema tonight. I think the insurance should cover it being administered by a German or Japanese domanatrix (with razor cut hair)

A tender coming of age story: The Summer of my 3 Urologists

To me, the worst thing is the Canadian tuxedo with American flags.

My dick looks like Trump’s hand.

In my opinion, opiates and benzodiazepines aren’t bad.

In my opinion, oxycontin isn't half bad.

Release the Gritty files.

There are things I’ll do and pretend they don’t affect me. One of those is Lower Wacker Drive.