Bob

I can even, I simply choose not to.

Ibuprofen, you buprofen, we all buprofen for ibuprofen.

Dreamed last night that M&S rich tea biscuits had raisins in. You can use that one, @stephenking.bsky.social.

Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever read a textbook in which the author says “The astute reader may have noticed” something you noticed?

Me: I cannot stress highly enough… My brain: Challenge accepted.

A movie couple who would definitely have a podcast.

The biscuits in the pack above the tear strip don’t count, right?

According to Argent, it’s “never too late to work 9 to 5”, but what about 6?

It has come to my attention that successˈlessness is a word.

I know nobody hears me on this platform, but I just want to say that the most wonderful thing about #Dark is the (perhaps ironical) fact that every time I finish watching it, I feel compelled to rewatch it from the beginning again.

I’m not allowed to reply to this, but I feel it so god damned hard.

Life hack: Keep, and carefully tend, a to-don’t list.

When xkcd teaches you about something cool you weren’t previously aware of.

Saw a car whose registration plate ended “UGH” today, and its a philosophy I can get behind.

4.7% does not a session ale make.

Just been past a butcher and a baker next door to each other. Anyone got any good books on making candles?

If you see a cat do a big stretch and don’t say “Big stretch!” you are dead inside.

“Watch what you say, lads, I’m starting to think we may have an imposter among us.”

@mooseallain.bsky.social Saw this,and it sounds like something you might draw:

THAT DUCK IS TWERKING.

Because I’m a #MessyBitch.

Can everyone imagine I have just posted a pixel-perfect photoshop of Kavan Novak on a Star Wars poster, titled NANDOR and skip straight to telling me how impressive my skillz are, please?

New stock phrase.

What’s a little e^i(kx - ωt) between friends? #PlaneWave #Physics

Miscegenation!

Knocked over a glass of water earlier. Good job I’m a pessimist.

Knocked over a glass of water earlier. Good job I’m a pessimist.

I do love a good daytime moon.

Spotify’s served me a track by a band that used to be a Pink Floyd tribute act, and oh my god you can tell. It’s like listening to Aldi own-brand packaging.

What if I’m a middle child? #Physics

Textbook authors be like “For the proof of X, see exercise 10.3.” Then “Exercise 10.3: prove X” #Physics

If you’re scared to say no to your partner, or they coerce you into sex, it’s abuse. #Consent should be given freely and enthusiastically. For support call our National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 or contact us online > www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk

I think this might have been my all-time most successful tweet.

Was having difficulty understanding something that a textbook considered obvious. After several days of thinking about it, I have finally figured out that it is, indeed, obvious. #Physics

I have run out of Locked Tomb books and I am bereft.

Jonesing for a hot cross bun.

Kramer vs. Kramer vs. Kramer vs. Kramer

Our broadband is down. Got an email telling me an Amazon parcel is due, and briefly worried about whether they’d be able to deliver if the internet was down. I have occasionally been accused of being intelligent.

As much as I abhor the phrase, Tamsyn Muir (of the Locked Tomb series) sure knows how to give you a good, hard kick in the feels every now and then.

The little yelp Feist does in the middle of Undiscovered First is my favourite thing today.

PhD Timeline xkcd.com/3081

Huge if true.

I think this might have been my all-time most successful tweet.

Get your #Times headline by taking any sentence you like and appending “in significant blow/boost to Rachel Reeves”.

Holy shit, #Sinners is incredible. See.

@joshspero.ft.com Apropos of nothing, your banner image works well in the Skeets iPad app:

I left my apple downstairs and accidentally created this year’s Turner Prize winning entry.

They’re fantastic, but the values make it look like some sort of achievement points system.

New euphemism just dropped.

I don’t want to be accused of a knee-jerk response, but it seems to me that the guy in charge of tariffs shouting “THIS IS A GREAT TIME TO BUY” a couple of hours before doing something that would greatly and predictably benefit buyers *seems* just a teeny bit MASSIVELY ILLEGAL. No?

Terry Pratchett KT Tunstall Neil Hannon Benoit Mandelbrot Paul Merton