Unicorn Mullet

Just got off the phone with my VA doctor. Everyone there is devastated and confused by Alex’s death, but they’re committed to continuing to do whatever they can for veterans. I have the best team in the US. Nothing stops these people at the VA. They just refuse to not show up.

Rockafella is here to chew on some bones and talk with you about your extended car warranty

DOJ improperly withheld FBI reports of interviews with an alleged Epstein victim who also alleged that Trump assaulted her as a young teenager. There is reporting that DOJ found her credible (this does not mean that it is true). I know there is a lot going on, but this should be a much bigger story.

Accidentally shot myself in the face with bear spray. I’m telling myself a lot of things right now.

Ever have a day where you just sit on the couch spraying whipped cream into your face while watching the first season of DeadLoch? Today was that day, and I can’t be the only one. #Deadloch

AOC: He impulsively went in on Venezuela. He impulsively went in on Iran. It led to increased global instability and every time he’s done that, it has been consistent with a spike in what is happening with the Epstein files. I think that he feels existentially tied to it.

Watching my dog decide whether to bark at the mailman or get a treat from my neighbor never gets old. Dude is conflicted AF

@erikschlitt.bsky.social what’s happening with maxx and bates? Lots of talk about these two.

A year ago, my dog accepted a treat from an Amazon delivery person. Due to this once moment in time, he has come to believe that all Amazon delivery drivers carry treats. If the driver does not comply, my male dog goes into immediate hysterical woman mode. He has a cabinet of treats here.

Rockafeller making a mess of everything at the buttcrack of dawn.

Soon enough, he’ll advocate that a horse become a senator.

As I get older, I find myself saying “twat” and “twatwaffle” and “twats in a twaddle.” At some point, my brain said “ok we’re old now, and our vocabulary should reflect as such.” I said “dooflaffy” the other day. What the hell is wrong with me?

Holy hell. Based on experiences with two toolbags, it’s fair to point out why this country is going to the shitter. People want attention not solutions. don’t like something, don’t play the “I told you so” game. We aren’t six years old. Be a grown up and do something different. Goddamn

@nekogurl12.bsky.social my problem is not with you I’ve no issue with you. I apologize to YOU if I came across too harsh. I did not intend to insult you. I will not apologize to the two others. But you’re a cool cat in my book and I meant nothing untoward with you.

I have been able to create a new home aesthetic by combining poverty and lesbianism. I call it “lesbian dive bar decor.” I don’t care about your opinion. I love it; It works for me.

I showed people how to ride in this town tonight. Ride with purpose. Velominati rule #3

I’m convinced that Bluesky is a lot of people who don’t like or want to go outside unless politically necessary. I don’t mean any insult, I’m here too.

This is better than the actual hearing.

“I will suck boots. I will tie their knots with my tongue if I need to.” -my brother, anticipating how to avoid a ticket while en route to AZ (to deliver my bike).

#CanadaSky🇨🇦

Team USA Curler Rich Ruohonen: "We'd be remiss if we didn't at least mention what's going on in Minnesota...I am a lawyer, as you know, and we have a constitution... and what's happening in Minnesota is wrong. There's no shades of gray. It's clear."

Kid Rock's halftime show was pre-taped on a soundstage in Atlanta, and they paid 200 actors to pretend to enjoy it..

So, has the staffer who posted that racist meme been fired, or is he still the President of the United States?

Is it bad that I enjoy the ice skating more than the skiing? Maybe it’s the fact that cycling is the same movement as skiing and therefore because I cycle so often- I don’t care? I’m so high I’m almost connected to starlink. Someone please help me answer these questions.

Congrats to all Seahawks fans who voted for Kamala Harris! #SuperBowl

youtube.com/shorts/jQhaK...

“A freedom of information request by Good Law Project has found that deaths by suicide of trans young people under 18 surged following the withdrawal of gender-affirming healthcare…” The political attacks on healthcare for young trans people has horrific outcomes. Trans youth deserve to thrive. 🏳️‍⚧️

Did people know that Bad Bunny had to wear a bullet proof vest under his Tuxedo at the Grammy awards ceremony due to so many death threats? Hey losers, your orange hero rapes children. You should be focusing your anger towards that and not on someone who was asked to play the Super Bowl #USDemocracy

Bad bunny: sings in Spanish Will wear a dress Green Day: anti fascism Melissa McCarthy: starring in Latin style commercial during superbowl.

Mullet bike build is coming along.

BREAKING: CBP agents who murdered Alex Pretti have been IDENTIFIED: Jesus Ochoa, 43, and Raymundo Gutierrez, 35. www.propublica.org/article/alex...

Might head out to the desert tonight to scream and smoke weed. I’ll probably eat some cheese too. And maybe scream some more. It’s for mental health purposes. (Previous solution: pool noodles slammed into ground, repeatedly) Will post results.

Im going to name that picture "The Minnesota Effect"

It would just be too delicious-after everything Trump had ICE do to Minnesota-if Minneapolis won I am envisioning ketchup on every wall in Mar-a-Lago www.thenation.com/article/acti...

America…

ICE chases Minneapolis protestor...🤣

My Jack Russell, rockyfella, is the strangest dude ever. He is committed to greeting everyone, except me (his owner). He has world class side eye game, is a champion digger, a Matt Damon fanboy, and a taco Tuesday fanatic. Dude gets 1/2 a taco a week; throws a fit if I miss a Tuesday. What’s today?