Martin Tupperware

This is my kids cleaning like crazy on December 23rd.

Its a psychological experiment into how far you can stretch "I was trying to tell everybody THIS WHOLE TIME!"

I dealt with a situation in a 3-4 league where it was basically "DO NOT COMPETE, have fun and make friends" and the teams played the entire season that way. In the last game, a team decided to show off all the skills they'd been on, to pitch THEIR youth sports program going forward. 🤔

The phrase "lame duck" is particularly desultory when you consider the mobility of ducks in perfect health.

Man, its gonna hit when he's polling below 1% and Gavin Newsom drafts him as the VP choice, then their ticket stalls in the mid-single digits in South Carolina.

Can't feel too bad about Trump not getting consent from priests, kinda "game recognizes game" situation.

NBC is trying to do with Tim Daly and Reba McEntire what they did with Betty White and Richard Mulligan 35 years ago, get the old viewers who don't go out on weekends anymore.

Everyone is excited for Halloween, but don't forget that Friday is National Haunted Fridge Day!

I wouldn't be surprised if Maher wrote that himself and got ahold of Trump's phone to setup a scheduled post.

The best Seahawks-Chiefs matchup was the "Derrick Thomas sets the single game sack record, Krieg hits Skansi on the last play to win the game" one.

The big takeaways from that Niners game two weeks ago that I had were "McCaffrey doesn't have THAT gear anymore", and "this team will be fucked when Mike Evans has his injury", alas...

Kyler Murray's undefeated Vikings take a fourth quarter lead;

"As a Man Of God, I'm shocked that I'm bleeding after blindly jamming my hand into The Box of Sharp Pointy Things."

You can either eat midnight Saturday chili dogs or maintain a low profile on Sunday morning, you can't do both.

"Fire breaks out at Quaker plant, none injured" OK, but does town smell like oatmeal cookies now?

Goodell on Jalen Hurts is a "gonna have to throw the league doctor under the bus, he said that protocols were met and if those protocols have holes, the buck stops below me, somewhere in the medical department" type of statement.

The underrated problem that's going to come of this is This Is Going To Be The Worst Week Ever To Be A Server At The Cheesecake Factory. Red hat types clogging up the cheesecake display in the lobby, asking for an early bird special, and tipping 3% on a bill they say is too expensive.

"EVERY SINGLE DEMOCRAT WILL VOTE HELL NO!" Fuck, I wish the imaginary enemies created by MAGA Inc. were the ones in the fight, rather than the "call your reps!" ones we actually have.

The Cheesecake Factory isn't fine dining, its Chili's and Applebee's standing on each other's shoulders in a steakhouse trenchcoat.

These Cougars are "Birnbaum/Mencke and the pieces don't fit yet" bad instead of "Paul Wulff is here to encourage kneeling before half and making the program a laughingstock!" bad, the first one is way more tolerable.

"The fix is in?" Lol, no, this man is just so underwhelming as a candidate that losing by 10 in Georgia isn't anything HE can affect. (Doing the postmortems, people will point to "they fielded universally awful candidates, because nobody good wanted to use their equity in this environment")

Yes, this is mortifying on a lot of levels... even more so when I vaguely remember how, a few years ago, it was pointed out to me "you know she's making countertop ice cream as messy fetish content, right?"

In discussing Crystal Lake with friends, there was a level of agreement that Linda Cardellini didn't really have a "crank it to 11" setting the character needed, and the "shoulda" that got the most excitement... was Melissa McCarthy.

One of my favorite movie lines... is the scene in Freeway, where Kiefer Sutherland asks "why are you doing this?" and Reese Witherspoon quickly responds with "BECAUSE I'M PISSED OFF AND THE WORLD OWES ME!" It's a thinker.

I feel like "unsure" and "would not vote" should be grouped separately.

Disappointed that this wasn't them sneaking Uecker's name onto the active roster somehow. Go Pilots!

The story of "we ceded our decision making to the computer and it was wrong" has like eight bulletpoints that indicate Don't Tell Anyone About This. Maybe Sark is drinking again.

Well, shit.

He's Lance Henriksen from Man's Best Friend and maybe he turned the movie off halfway through, too bad, it was pretty fun, and worked out great for the people who engineered the dogs.

Gonna go off book and honor Tom Skerritt by watching Knight Moves, RIP.

Trump was deterred from renaming the Atlantic Ocean, when it was brought to his attention that it was the second most water in the... history of water.

Usually I look at the pictures of "expensive groceries" the same way I looked at people who lost that lowest-to-highest game on Price Is Right. "The Ziploc bags and popcorn were still there, why did you pick the specialty conditioner?"

I wonder why he didn't want to shake hands.

These are the guys who will demand public sentiment side with them when the billionaires want to put in a salary cap next month. Huh.

That Ja'Marr Chase anecdote just makes me think he recognized "there's nothing this six year old kid has done where we should make HIM feel like his dad is a terrible person just because his dad is a terrible person, he'll figure it out pretty quickly."

Positive feedback on Strawberry Cheesecake Pop-Tarts.

"Don't you wanna party... with your whole party?" Fucking Jesus, no. If I didn't want time in my personal space on vacations, they have hotel rooms for that too.

I will note the "machine changed my vote!" allegations while waiting until I SEE something decisive; youtu.be/EV_c1-YTk8M?...

Of course it was gonna be The Dead Guy, we live in the "once the table stakes are WAY lower, maybe?" era of Journalism. I bet whoever was putting it together has a half-dozen other names those escorts provided, too. Who this might be an issue for is his sister, no one worse at tough questions.

It's a fine line between "making jokes at their expense, BAD!" and "Anything YOU say about a bigoted rep who railed against The Things, made The Things illegal, then did The Things themselves, is way less impactful than all the actual, existing policy that their bigotry and self-hatred drove."

Also big news for the comb industry.

Problem number like, 17, with that Vivek ad, is that her mom looks like a bridge troll, or one of those crones who foretells death, rather than a "heels and pearls" Republican that the base loves to pretend they have in abundance.

This goes next to "painting a pool" in a "can't these fucking idiots do anything I'd trust to a competent apartment complex handyman?"

An underrated issue with covid was how it killed so many more of the "community facing, helping people" elderly than the "miserable, lonely complainers with 70 years of reasons people avoid them" elderly.