zaumeli.bsky.social

My early works... I don't know how people liked them. But then it was too late. Fucking. Three years later and I was better. And the last year I've started, like, actually reaching a level I'm content with. But like. Do you know what I mean? Absolutely harrowing for the brain to do this. Harrowing.

The curse of despising sex and all things that come from it but being skilled at writing smut. I did not choose this. I mean I did, but like. I didn't know I was sex-repulsed until I had already developed the skill. What do I do now? The people love me, and yet I am their opposite. Woe. Woe is me...

Heh. Hehehe. If. Ifyou use the. The lettersfrom the end of the last post. To draw. It. It. . .—. | | | .—.—. | | It looks like a little creature. Like a cat. Or a dog. Heh. Hehehe. Cool right. i think soooooo

oh.......... not a bug person.... "bug"........ Maybe they already are inside of me....? i............ im lost....................... Drats. defeated. unbelievable. Really, really unbelievable. Like, damn. damn. Uh. later, dudes.

I am not a bug person bug I mean hey! Bugs seem to like me!! Maybe I should pivot just change my opinion and lock in on bugs!? Like ask them to come over! Yes little friends! Land on Me! On My Skin! GET IN MY SKIN PLEASE WOOOOHOOOO YES GO UNDER MY SKIN ARE YOU HAPPY NOW??!? YAY! THATS WHAT MATTERS!!

aaaaaaaahhhhh i dont know dude i mean you said we were cool but im still getting a "brushed my teeth but mouth tastes funky still" vibe from you and honestly? i am Not Loving It so if you could like. Fix Your Vibe??? tttthat would be sick. like just Tell Me The Problem and i will Fix It. Thanks....

Wow! You sure would think that the kids a street over would get tired of SCREAMING LOUD AS FUCK after the third hour, right? Well, nope! Haha! I love this town and all the people in it :) I might just go door to door and ask them how their days are :) make everyone gift baskets :) Love being here!!!

Saw god with her. Homies till the end.

Died to worm grass. Let her go. And moments later, she came right back. No clue why. Tragic. Struggling to clamber onto the stupid Deer? She enters the room. I need to swallow a pearl? She waits patiently on the wall. So peaceful. So calm. Survived two spitty butter looking lizards together <333

Lol. Lmao even. Rain World my beloved <333 In Farm Arrays with my dearest companion, Gilles the Squidcada. Genuine bond there. She has come to my aid numerous times, traversing multiple screens to find me even after I accidentally threw a rock at her in a tunnel. True friendship :]

zaumeli.bsky.social reposted

Iron Bramble 🪻

@ironbramble.com

21 Sept

In 5 days, Iron Bramble's demo hit Overwhelmingly Positive!! Thank you all for your support. It means so much to us... None of us have gotten a game rated this highly before 😳😳

16 Sept

0 Celsius at night and 28 during the day. Fuck. Spring, climate change, yay. Sick, sleep disorder, aggressive allergies, god mothafuckin damn I am a miracle. How am I alive. Hhow

15 Sept

Also, in other more interesting news, I have personally managed to disprove the concept that matter may not be created nor destroyed! My body can apparently turn one tiny sip of water into half a fucking litre of mucus! My nose is a tap and God was never with us at all. Plague, pestilence and death!

15 Sept

I can call over my elderly dog just by crouching. Click click go my fuckin knees, them bitches loud as fuck. And no, that isn't hyperbole. I crouched to grab something off the ground and the motherfucker turned right around as soon as my knees did protest the act. I ain't even old bro, just broken.

8 Sept

Ever try to write a scene with a memory as a base but you genuinely don't know whether it is a memory you experienced or one you created to feel better? Genuine question am curious. Does it also feel almost like smooply smoke in your head when you try to find specifics to model the setting off of?

8 Sept

If I weren't bipolar before playing Rain World then I would most certainly be after the last few days. 8/10 enjoy it. It good.

7 Sept

Also god motherfuckin damn man. Why is there always an invisible enemy?!??! There is no need. Oh wow, how cool! And unique! An enemy you cannot see! That is every enemy to me. I am half-blind even with glasses. But yes, white lizard, wreck my shit because I cannot see you right next to me. Fffuck.

7 Sept

Boot up Rain World start playing and get ready to put the controller down my pants because god. Fucking damn. All I get is the rain vibration. The last two hours, twenty percent it feels like has been end of cycle get fucked rain and the endless vibration. Fuck. Fuck. I hate this. Fuck. White lizard

zaumeli.bsky.social reposted

BlueSR

@bluesr.bsky.social

3 Sept

Happy 1 Year of Silksong!🎉 It's hard to articulate how special this game is and how much it means to me. It really has changed my life for the better in so many ways, just like Hollow Knight did years ago, and i'm forever grateful for Team Cherry's artistry. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SILKSONG!❤️

Team Cherry@teamcherry.bsky.social

The hunt is on! Hollow Knight: Silksong is available now on all platforms, including day one on Xbox Game Pass!

3 Sept

My secret is that I listen to music that deeply and overwhelmingly upsets me to listen to because it latches onto my deep subconscious. And then I write. The trick is to give yourself a breakdown every other day, and then the characters are real. Like. Genuine pieces of yourself. True magic I wield.

Like I get it its meant to be a challenge. I fuck with challenges. Not when there is no way to tell what input is right or wrong, it kicks you all the way to the hideout ship every fail unless you reset, and it does a big, ominous, distracting and stress-inducing countdown. Movement tech in shooter?

Why? Literally why. The challenge is literally don't feel disgustingly inadequate and upset because the game is cruel and like. Poorly designed. Because I love Raiders but. But it is not a game built around maneuverability in long stretches. Tight movement over short distance? Yeah. Obstacle course?

No man. You have something that way too slippy, and the other thing that makes your momentum stop. Just alternate them? Well, I would! But there are spots where you need to jump twice. And you cant until you wait a full like 5 seconds. And others where the dash just fucks you. Fuck, man. Sad :(

Genuinely going to fucking cry why the FUCK is Zesty Speed Menu so difficult for no reason???? And if I dont do it I cant fucking. Get all my upgrades. I literally cannot react fast enough because my brain does not function that way and I just. Man. Cant even be made easier either. No accessibility.

16 Aug

Somebody euthanise me I just spent the last ten minutes recording a vocal melody alongside my guitar and the phone was too close to the guitar so I have fucking. Nothing. God I just want it all to end. Overstimulated as fuck.

Bought the like. Full Dredge bundle on my Switch 2 on half price, thought it wouldnt exactly be my thing but liked the look of it. By jove. I have spent the last three hours stuck on it. Thrilling. Delightful. Terrifying. It is 4 in the am and the house is dark and I am terrified. 10/10 very nice.

Writing my beloved ❤️❤️❤️ and yet also beloathed good heavens what do you mean I'm starting a fifth and sixth series that are placed in a seperate universe now. fuck..... goddamn........ Actually that's probably my fault not writing's. Whatever. The burden of creativity. Great until you burn out.

Writing a character with identity issues is so challenging. Specifically when it comes from failing to form an identity early on. You almost have to write the story around them to some degree, because like. They mimic outside influences, so it's sort of like writing an abstract mirror of others?

It has of just wiping out the distinction of their self and the behaviours of those they know best. It makes for insane fun to explore the effect of your own brain deciding that you will model anger after someome who harrassed you for ages and the way it feels like a parasite in there! But uh.

Someome. Good heavens. Anyways uh. Yeah not so fun when I have to write them in a number of scenes where I need to show the underlying feelings that they aren't entirely aware of so the reader can piece together the character and properly appreciate and celebrate their eventual discovery of identity

Realise the proportions are off when you get to the rest of the arm. But in this case it's like "No I would not feel like that" and I have to sort of try out a few ways of working until I understand their specific conditions and core values when everything else is stripped away. Fundamentals, yay!

Like fundamentally they don't want to hurt people right? But also, after enough pushing they can snap, but it will quickly deteriorate into just a sort of childlike sadness? Because that's the most they really developed, given their specific past. School trauma yay. Love it. Do not. Love. The effect

I mean. It also doesn't help that like. They are the main character? And I also rely on like some kind of weird intuition to write. There's like a muscle in my sternum that tells me how the character thinks and feels. Weird but it works. Until there's a character who doesn't know how they feel!

And then it's like. Sometimes I get a prompt from them like "No, you misrepresented me there, don't like that at all", but only like sometimes. It's like trying to draw something but you can only trace the silhouette with one hand while the other does the drawing. You get the hand right and then-

Ahhh I'm not explaining this well. If a character is content or otherwise stuck pretending they are their own distinct person, a lot of their interactions are erratic because they slip between identities rather suddenly? So not only is it hard to interpret what they are trying to do while I write-

Them, it is also difficult to have them strike out or do things for themselves, because they don't necessarily have their own values? Or at least aren't ready to share those with others. Which does make the moments they do decide to act really powerful! But wow is it difficult to write them til then

And if they are constantly masking and mimicking others, then they really just. Don't have much of a presence? In the sense that while they do interact in their unique way, they also do emulate behaviours modelled to them, so it's hard to get them to try anything. Because they're kinda... absent?

Pretty sure theyre just making new Zelda games for the newbies so they can get cash because like. Fuck.

Now it's just blank empty protagonist with as little background as possible so that everyone can pretend as efficiently as possible. No whimsy. There's the barest pretense, so that you think it may be something you can immerse yourself in, but in the end there's no life in it. Just nostalgia bait.

So fuckin tired man. Where did the spirit go? When did time slip far enough that there's no way to find it again?

Pretty sure theyre just making new Zelda games for the newbies so they can get cash because like. Fuck.

I remember playing Wind Waker HD on my Wii U as a kid. It was hard. The Forsaken Fortress was incredibly frustrating. But when I managed to beat a boss, it was rewarding. There was real sense of progression. Get a pearl to get to the Tower of the Gods to get to Hyrule and the Master Sword.

I'm not saying that is revolutionary. But at the very, very least, it gave you something to look forward to. Some line to follow. It gave you the feeling that what you were doing was leading you somewhere. I felt like I was actually on a meaningful quest! I was doing the work to save Hyrule!

Pretty sure theyre just making new Zelda games for the newbies so they can get cash because like. Fuck.

Two mainline Zeldas in almost ten years and both are just... designed to sellout. They don't have the same passion anymore. They feel lifeless. The emergence of gaming as an industry rather than a niche has been catastrophic for the quality of the games produced. In the case of AAA games at least.

Fairly sure that Tears of the Kingdom was designed poorly intentionally so they could sell Age of Imprisonment. It just saddens me that we've reached a point where money matters more than actual innovation. And I don't mean "oh wow, TotK physics engine is amazing!" I mean making a game that's alive.

Pretty sure theyre just making new Zelda games for the newbies so they can get cash because like. Fuck.

The combat is really just tedious rather than threatening. Oh no, what shall I do but spam the stupid shark enemy. Oh, and it's shocked! New shark. In the air? Oh, silly me for expecting the FUCKING BIRD to ATTACK the FLYING ENEMY I did not realise that they prefer to nudge their privates instead.

Just depressing dude. Just. Really? We went from Twilight Princess and Wind Waker and like. Like even Breath of the Wild, despite it's sort of empty overworld and all that, was still enjoyable. It had a decent story. One you can hear and enjoy. It had characters that felt real. This... doesn't.

Pretty sure theyre just making new Zelda games for the newbies so they can get cash because like. Fuck.

There is no real depth of character. So far, the only characters that seem to feel even kind of like actual characters and not cliches or narrative devices are Impa and Lueberry, who only really seem that way because they're fucking charicatures of characters. Nostalgia bait almost.

I feel like an IGN game journalist. Oh, thanks Tri! I never would have known that they were upset and I should follow them! Oh, but wait, who was it that was groaning? Oh, good, you'll tell me two fucking seconds after the text box appeared, because I cannot read the name in the top left.

Pretty sure theyre just making new Zelda games for the newbies so they can get cash because like. Fuck.

The story so far is... meh. Even suspending my disbelief that this game costs like 80 fucking dollars, the scenes read like Netflix slop. Like. Oh no, the Zora dont like each other! Oh, they played a tune! Oh, theyre great friends again! Thank goodness, I dont think I could handle a moment more.