Zach 🐷🤠

Ran for the first time since Chicago this morning (finally) and I listened to Stevie Ray Vaughan on the way in to work, I am a genuine menace to society this morning.

[/walks on stage, taps mic, unfurls scroll] Here are 1,001 reasons why I, an LSU fan, think an afternoon kickoff against Alabama is good. Reason the first: it m—[/a shepherd’s crook pulls me offstage as the crowd boos and throws tomatoes]

Truck is loaded up, just need to pack a bag, and for the first time in three years I get to play this song and say AUBURN, WE’RE COMIN TO YOUR CIT-AYYYYYYY

Sixth trip to Auburn is this weekend. That got me thinking, of all the away trips I’ve made, I’ve been to Florida the next-most (three times), then Georgia, Ole Miss, and Tennessee twice each. I attended my first college football game as a freshman in college. Pretty neat!

2010 Arkansas: Karnell Hatcher committing targeting on Morris Claiborne (they were teammates), leading to an Arkansas TD, this was also the band trip we blew meal money on some Sock ‘Em Boppers so we could box in our hotel rooms (band kids are dumb as hell, never forget this).

Sixth trip to Auburn is this weekend. That got me thinking, of all the away trips I’ve made, I’ve been to Florida the next-most (three times), then Georgia, Ole Miss, and Tennessee twice each. I attended my first college football game as a freshman in college. Pretty neat!

2017 Tennessee: getting militantly drunk in a Knoxville parking lot at 10:30 AM the first game of the Brady Hoke interim era, the second half kickoff occurred in what can best be described as “a dishwasher,” we couldn’t see it and neither could the TV cameras.

Sixth trip to Auburn is this weekend. That got me thinking, of all the away trips I’ve made, I’ve been to Florida the next-most (three times), then Georgia, Ole Miss, and Tennessee twice each. I attended my first college football game as a freshman in college. Pretty neat!

It’s always interesting when I talk to people where this stuff is basically genetic, I was more of the “go to LSU and do band, figure out the rest later” type.

Render dat

actually I want the SEC to give LSU more morning kickoffs because it’ll just make me grind harder

Dudes love stopping at Walmart with their silly little reusable grocery bag for a rotisserie chicken and some odds and ends after work.

I prefer feeling pain outdoors and in the context of doing cardio rather than lifting (I am getting better about this), also I work an 8-5 job and like carbs.

I am particularly averse to This Bullshit™️ because lots of people are doing the most they possibly can with the time and resources they have, and asking rhetorically “what the fuck is YOUR EXCUSE?” is just another way of making people feel like they aren’t doing enough, and that happens too often.

I prefer feeling pain outdoors and in the context of doing cardio rather than lifting (I am getting better about this), also I work an 8-5 job and like carbs.