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This is the greatest news report I have ever seen.

Kyle Clark@kylec.bsky.social

Squirrels on suicide missions have knocked out power to Castle Rock, Colorado twice this week. Our investigation has revealed a century of squirrel attacks covered up by the pro-squirrel media.

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And people thought I was crazy! The squirrels are out to kill us all! Do you have any idea how many cows are farting methane into the atmosphere!? Now imagine how many squirrels are doing it!!!