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In light of the PHP breach, I am deleting the entire Internet. Apologies if you found it useful – the whole thing has been a figment for my imagination which you’ve been using without my permission and I think it’s time to use my brain space for something more fun like sausage recipes.

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It's probably for the best. We had a good run. I always knew stockpiling far more movies and TV shows I could conceivably watch in a lifetime would pay off.