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I haven’t posted anything controversial in a while, I think, so here goes: C is for crouch. It’s not Control. It should be C. You can easily hit C with your thumb, as well as jump, so you can crouch jump. Ctrl is way too far down for a pinky to hit in the heat of battle.

How do you crouch and not jump without moving the base of your thumb up off the desk? Or do you have like a wrist rest that's like 3x thicker than your keyboard???