Evan Larson

It’s okay guys they reached the depths it’s okay they definitely didn’t drown guys haha they broke reality and reached the depths haha it’s okay guys

Toby… what the fuck…

Powder that makes you say Deltarune tomorrow

I’ve got a fever and the only cure would be @kamakeen.bsky.social covering The Fragment from song of the elves

I don’t smoke weed but I’d eat the fuck out of some cheese rn

I think if I could magically transform into anything I’d just become a silly lil goblin character that just mildly fucked with people all the time in ways that would make them laugh and think I’m charming

I forgot about Bluesk👁️ Hello fraunds

Car troubles seem to only ever happen when I don’t have the money to fix them 😓

When people talk about “Eldritch horrors beyond human comprehension” it always feels weirdly disappointing to have the incomprehensibility be purely mechanical. Like “Wide Ape” for instance. I mean, technically it is incomprehensible in the sense that it is infinitely wide, but it just feels cheap.

Last night I had a dream that I was the president and I was being investigated for some scandal I was involved in, and in an interview I came up with the ingenious quote of, “Well, if you keep looking for hairs in the soup, sooner or later you’ll find a head”

BREAKING NEWS: Local man realizes the hate he held on to for years wouldn’t get him anywhere in life and that his views on social issues were misguided; changes his mind. Millions are shocked

I unironically believe that if the US government were run like the poll system in OSRS we would be a lot better off

Haven’t eaten anything in 24 hours but have had about a gallon of coffee, shit got me shaking like a chihuahua

>open Steam “woke content detector” >game flagged as woke >first word in description is “allows”

Ah, yes. But trans people surely are the bigger threat to children right?

You should not be expected to respect factually incorrect information under the guise of “it’s just my opinion man”

Happy late birthday gay people or something idk

Wait… you guys can tune things out?

Numbers are so much fun! Post 1488 on Twitter and nobody bats an eye, but post 8647 on Instagram and everybody loses their minds

It’s like a HOUSE… for COWS.

Bring cringe fucking rocks why didn’t anyone tell me

I have realized today that an overwhelming majority of decisions I have made in my life have boiled down to “would this be funny”

FUCK DONALD TRUMP

The masculine urge to die in battle covered in the blood of my enemies

The latest knocked loose record is the first time since I was maybe 9 that music has made me feel genuine terror. Shit goes absolutely FERAL

Billie Joe Armstrong with blond hair is like the product of Tony Hawk and David Spade colliding in a fusion reactor

every single elected democrat should be posting like this

Victorian era people be like: babe I’ve had my monthly bath, time for sex

I feel like I’m the only person on the planet that prefers RS3 to old school

Cringe is an intrinsic response, not an extrinsic one. If you cringe at something you read online, that’s on you. Not the poster.

I am not a good person, but I try to do good things

Lil bro wants to bake pecan muffins w/ me 🥲

If this flag offends you, I’ll help you pack

Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime

Always 💖 Don't make me tap the sign

Doing this a lot with people around me lately. It’s paid tremendous dividends to my mental health.

In 2016, when Trump was elected the first time, I, like some of you, laughed at the people who said that if he won, they’d be moving to Canada. I thought, ‘Well that’s a bit overdramatic. Let’s give this guy a chance and see how things go.’ In 2024, that doesn’t seem like such a bad idea.

America is cooked.

You will never learn who is shitting on you by looking down

When I’m in a lull period at my job I like to draw knock off Regular Show characters

Happy Halloween everyjuan