Brandon Mayes

Hide your couches.

Not a bit surprising.

6yr wanted to make his own soup. Sautéed carrot, onion, broccoli and beef broth soup:

Wife finished her half marathon this morning with a sub 9 pace. 💪🏼

Almost 90 yesterday. Heaters on tonight…

Shut up, POG.

It’s simple: “I’m not going to lie for you. Fire me if you want.”

Fractional Scaramucci!

It’s funny because it’s overshadowing how bad she is at the job.

Jake 👀

It’s good to keep focus on the important things in these times.

The correct retort is: “Get the fuck out of here, specialist.”

There’s jokes…

Kinder treats are great for the boy. Especially when the toy is “Franklin the Dog.”

It’s very wrong. But just walk right past those dorks.

this isn't who we used to pretend to be

To be clear, I’m not okay with it. But: if the government is going to execute people, it should do so in the least painful (see probably most “violent”) manner and make it public so they can’t hide what it truly is. Also, those involved should be named.

There will be standing issues…

More like Notre Lame.

Texting my wife like I just copped a zip. But it was just Pokémon at msrp.

Ozzie!

I got a torch ready to go.

Every time someone posts about USMNT, I sing in my head, "US Mutant Ninja Turtles." Turtle power.

If you’re moved by this guy crying boy oh boy are there some other images and videos you should check out

Pete Hegseth went to the A&M game and they lost to Kentucky for the first time in over 70 years. THERE IS NO BATTLE HE CANT LOSE.

NC State doing State things…

If the public only knew how cherished those planes are…

America, writ large, will get to see the grandeur that is the Melbourne Cricket Grounds (the MCG or The G). Us AFL fans have known (I’ve also been to an Ashes match there).