Keith

I was at the grocery store and saw someone wearing a sweatshirt that said "Antarctica". Did they have to buy that at the gift shop because it was colder there than they expected?

I was wakened in the wee hours this morning by a phone call. As soon as I heard the cheerful greeting of a sales call, whether from a human or a bot, I just said "Oh f*ck off!" and hung up. Now my phone says it never happened. So it was likely half dream and half me shouting at my alarm.

There were 50 things to vote on for my #California #midterms ballot. So it was handy that I was able to find a right-wing clown's "voter guide" that I could confirm that my choices were the opposite of.

Weather cancellation. (This is a math joke)

I just can't wrap my head around what kind of person is "pleading for an invitation to an event with Eric Trump"

Photographer caught him during his community theatre rehearsal for Shrek. "Geet oat of mah swamp!" (Alt Text: stills of Trump lurching around while Mike Tyson and some other ogre watch)

One odd thing: Do you know what's closer to Iran than San Diego is? Basically every part of the U.S except Hawaii. (The Southern tip of Texas is close)

My man looks like a painting of a potato that was retouched by an old woman in a Spanish church.

My co-worker had come in one morning and found a dead mouse in his cubicle. We hadn't known about mice in the building before that. He didn't want to deal with it so he sent off a ticket to facilities. Their response was pretty quick. It was only 5 minutes before the IT guy came with a new mouse.

Just made a variant of this to use up some seafood mushrooms that I got in a veggie box. It's delightful. Thank you!

Grateful for the opportunity to spend #CanadaDay on the traditional lands of the Blackfoot Confederacy.

As I was scrolling, before I noticed the name, my brain initially registered this as a @makesomenoise.dropout.tv prompt. I could hear it in my head with the wrong Reich's voice.

Name a TV show you're positive no one remembers but you.

I already have some from Lower Decks.

Pop. Six. Squish. Uh-uh. Cicero. Lipschitz.

TIL there are thousands of scaffolding experts on the internet who have been just waiting for their moment to inform everyone how long it should take.

Rock me, rock me, rock me, sexy Jesus.

It's not usually so obvious that the two camera angles aren't in the same place and time. The climate isn't even the same.

Show someone who absolutely rocks a hat (that isn't Indiana Jones)

I complimented someone yesterday, then I noticed that they were wearing Meta anti-privacy glasses. My opinion of this person instantly changed.

@effinbirds.com you have some stiff competition.

I haven't lived in Minneapolis since I was a toddler in the early 70's. I haven't even lived in the U.S. for more than 30 years. But I somehow still have a deep pride for the heart that "my city" is showing. And a rage in my core for the brute squad to go to hell (but that ship has sailed).

Transphobia is a cancer of the heart and mind. It is a useless fear, based on ignorance and cruelty. Trans people are not responsible for a single one of the problems we face. Do the world a favor and grow the fuck up.

Using "Lutnick/Trump Percentages", a $100 item that is 50% off now costs $66.67.

Sam's Club (Walmart) - well known for providing people with health benefits.

Movie that takes place where you’re from.

That precise angle of your laptop screen when you leave it unattended at home; where it's closed enough that the cats can't walk on the keyboard, but not so much that they'll step on the back and close it.

Especially in states that are gerrymandering to maximize seats. When they've made razor thin margins, any tide change could bite them in ass.

1. Many of you have seen a graph purporting to show trans identification has decreased in recent years. Matt Walsh and Elon Musk celebrated it as a victory over "transgenderism." Turns out, the entire graph is based on an egregious math and statistics error. Subscribe to support our journalism.

There's really no downside for the outlets to make this decision. If all you're allowed to do is regurgitate what they approve, there's no point in paying a reporter to be there.

"You want to have a bird put on something and there's just no one who can do it."

If they had managed to find even one instance of people attacking ICE, it would be in here multiple times from every angle. But, nope, just ICE attacking people.

Citizens have no obligation to listen to a damn thing that chambers of commerce say.

This is masculinity too

Please #Alberta log in and request your vaccine this way the government will see the high demand by so many of us. You are not committing to paying nor an appointment at this time. I certainly hope someone challenges this in court, it’s outrageous that we have to pay!

"feels like" doing the heavy lifting here.

Grateful to be here today on this traditional land of the Stoney-Nakoda. #CanadaDay #Kananaskis #Canada

When I heard the mom of a trans girl say the night her daughter came out to her was the first time she'd ever seen her child happy, I knew it was a story I needed to share. These are the stories the public isn't hearing. An honor to get to report on 3 family's journeys for @teenvogue.com.

Without boring anyone with the details, I had a weird dream last night where I chose to be a defiant agent of chaos in order to "fuck up the standard deviations". I'm a little stuck in that mode this morning and it's not helping me do my work.

Canada Post tabled a 2000 page offer to CUPW on May 21. Our contract expires May 22. When CUPW asked for a 2 week extension to review the offer, Canada Post refused. They gave us ONE day to review 2000 pages that will deeply affect the lives and livelihoods of 55,000 workers. #cupw #canadapost

Waiting for #Carney in #calgary. #ElbowsUp #CanadaStrong #CanadaSky