mike

Cheesecake factory is a good place to go if you want to spend 90 minutes trying to decide which of the 300 entrees to order

Just went to read a gift article and they still wanted me to log in. Why? Why do I need to log in to read the free article? Why are you such sluts for my data?

The scandal here is that they found out she has a maiden name, which is of course the same as her brother, and instead of coming to the extremely logical conclusion it's because they have the same father, they assume she married her brother.

Casually admitting Trump's economy is a sinking ship.

Two weeks before an election, I think the GOP should absolutely go on camera and talk about how private citizens should be punished by their government for not giving their public officials the attention and admiration they demand.

Interesting how we never find a good universal term for swim attire. The UK call it a swimming costume, which seems like you wear it for Halloween and a bunch of other people call it a bathing suit which is probably not appropriate for the office.

"I'm only going to vote for him 4 or 5 more times before I start to think I'm being conned"

What is going on in Peru. Why are they naming all their kids after dictators.

Me, who can't run 10 feet without dying: "what a loser"

Tell Andrew, it was me

Looks like a ghost wearing a humam costume for Halloween

One of the best

Hegseth really said no weirdos, beardos, and fatties allowed in the military and then introduced three guys to lead a military initiative who are weird, bearded, and fat.

Introduction: My name is Lance, I’m a Cherokee artist in South Dakota. I will share my spiritual paintings and works on this account, likes/reposts & follows are much appreciated. 🙏🏼 #art #indigenousart #artistintroduction #native #nativepride #indigenous #native #nativeamerican #painting #acrylic

*Trump abducts democratic candidates and arrests liberals enmasse ahead of the midterms* The media headlines: "Trump tests the boundaries of his power with unconventional election tactics"

The snf football song is just the formula for "i hate myself for loving you" by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts.

Trump has been in trouble several times for lying to financial institutions about his personal and business finances btw.

So these not real people have enrolled in the ACA, pay a monthly premium, but don't get care to somehow defraud the system? I didn't know i could make money by not getting Healthcare.

But I need to smile more.

Imagine a helicopter having a mid air collision with your cat litter

holy shit, dems actually have a chance to flip the PA Senate and NC leg to get trifectas in both states I have updated the optimized state donation list so we can donate to these candidates that just need a little bit of $ to take advantage of what could be the biggest blue wave in history

Beef is too expensive. But, good news! Chicken and pork are also expensive.

Interesting thought: perhaps trumps previous assassination attempts were meant to be successful, giving himself lasting notoriety in death.

The oligarchy spends vast amounts of money to elect Republicans to make more money. Those same oligarchs spend vast amounts of money to elect centrist dems in elections Republicans can't win to keep from losing money.

Of all the things that taste like chicken, it kind of weird that eggs are not one of those things.

Not only did I meet Robert Kraft, I worked for him. His kid Jonathan asked me to “remove the black music” from my gameday playlist in ‘94 & I refused so they fired me. I was the cheerleader director at the time.  I sued them for wrongful termination and won. So yes, I know that motherfucker. 

💖 please watch 'til end 🤣🙃🤭 #tiffanygomas #mitchMconnell

Awesome, we are buying our own weapons and then sending them to Israel to kill children

"I'm not getting involved because I'm not a political person" Ok but politics is going to affect your life and everyone in it, regardless of how uncomfortable it makes you. No stance is a stance.

Not sure who doesn't already know this, but if an account immediately reposts something you wrote, and their name is something like "Help save my family from the war in xxx" it's most certainly a scam.

Thinking about the students I gave a ride to earlier who were talking about the $300 they bet on OSU to beat Texas

Pretty sure serial killers describe their childhoods this way in therapy.

Yes, it's good. But also, this dude for sure had a stroke and it was covered up.

"I'm sorry I can't pay my rent on time but trump just renamed another lake so things should be turning around soon"

Omg this is like the satanic panic of the 70s and 80s except 100 times dumber.

Wow michigan, as a wmu alum i will say that was the most embarrassing win I've ever seen

Madison Keys up 5-0 with a match point in the 3rd set and then loses the next 7 games

27 weeks so far

Telling the fed reserve to ignore all the red flags and stop doing the things to keep a recession from happening bc it might make the oligarchy incapable of being as rich as they want to be.

"We don't give a shit what happens to the lesser people, regulation is a financial burden when we could be putting that money in our own, overflowing pockets."

The Mortal Kombat theme song is based off a Scandinavian gospel song. It's a Finnish Hymn.

This is a reason why dems lose fringe voters. Whenever they credibly criticize someone in the right and they are met with cries of shame from the right, they immediately tuck tail and back down. The right successfully weaponizes empathy against the left for honest criticism.