Post

Brexit was a dumb idea.

*write 🙄

Natalie will be right there, taking down his every last gasp. Unless It happens more suddenly, elsewhere.

Funnily enough, while this thing goes viral, I am finishing my chapter on early modern news echoes and media events. Virality is a concept my book deals with. #newshistory

Have a good day Dan.😁

That day, my five words will be: ABOUT FECKING TIME, GRIM REAPER!!!

I'm not going to be able to work that day. Just pressing f5 on my computer all day long

I've formally requested that the Canadian authorities use the National Emergency Alert System to notify everyone via cell phone the moment mango Mussolini finally departs for hell. 👹 We'll not want to waste any time in getting that celebration started. 🎉🎊🍻

Thanks for starting the one thing that made me roar with laughter today

I laced all the milk

‘That swan wasn’t cooked properly’.

we must immanentize the eschaton

I’ve seen C beams glitter

Take care of my corgis

Liz Truss, WHAT THE FUCK

Must invite Liz over again

"What did Andrew do now?"

"thanks for all the fish" implies the queen was a dolphin in disguise and escaped earth through mystical dolphin means before the impending destruction of the world, and faked her death

Johnson? Now Truss? Fuck no!

Andy is still a wanker

Didn’t beat Louis XIV bugger

President Trump just shot me.

"Beans on toast for tea".

morbin' time, morbin' time, morbin'

All is discovered. Flee posthaste.

Stop the rock cant stop

Smell of petroleum prevails throughout

Peace out bitches. The Queen.

“Tell Cersei it was me”.

Laissez les bons temps rouler

Spiky…

Inheritance tax, not for Charles

Andrew does love pizza express

Liz Truss, what a moron

I always hated fucking corgis

Liz Fricking Truss...I KNOW!

"I WILL NEVER, EVER DIE"

"And what do you do?"

Oh, what’s the bloody point?

yknow, quasimodo predicted alla this.

Oh dear, The Prime Minister.

I like crackers and snacks.

Goddamn those goddamn Torries goddammit

I didn’t outlive the lettuce…

I feel better than ever.

Trying anal. Wish me luck.

I miss Philip's huge hog.

"Tomorrow I climb Mount Everest."

John Cleese: "No, that can't be right. It only say *one* word here." Eric Idle: "Well, technically it's a contraction of two words." John Cleese: "Yeah, but where's the rest of it? Did she die midway through the sentence? It just says 'It's'." www.youtube.com/watch?v=-rut...

I should have aborted Andrew

Wrong answers only!

Charles? What are you do-

To those few people who liked that post - thank you. You are my type of people.

And they called it a mine!

👏👏👏👏👍 agree

nah, beat your meat to it.

😆 I swear, that was accidental. Now, it's all speaking haiku is a contraction considered cheating? I have gin, my friend please bring us some juice.

“I don’t feel too good”

Orangemen are not actually English.

keep truss away from me

You poor saps are f**ked

I just did a poo.

Jschlatt you piece of shit

The world smells of paint.

Now, where is one's Rabbit?

in the castle of AAAAAARRRRGHHH

Cutting ribbon. Another busy day.

“Cromulent fuckcrustable of a day.”

“Liz Truss? I’d rather die.”

"Fucking Google Authenticator...Jesus Christ..."

My kingdom for a horse

Andrew goes or I do

www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJU5...

Little bear is a cunt

oh God, not this again

Nah, that was definitely in the will

This job really was pointless

What has Andrew done now??

Someone feed the bloody corgis!

scarf doctor was the best

Philip wasn’t really Charles’s father.

“Is that all there is?”

Both nonces? For fucks sakes!

Scotland still belongs to me.

And the BAFTA goes to…

"Oh fuck, Charles outlived me!"

"Make it look accidental, Bond."

I'm up for Gangsta Trippin!

How to resurrect final exam

Andrew wasn't at Pizza Express

I really genuinely hate corgis.

"I killed that bitch Diana" - definitely not Sun Tzu

Kick out the jams, mothafuckas!

Let corgis eat my body

"I'm coming Diana. Gloves on."

“🎶I GET KNOCKED DOWN, BUT-“

Liz Truss is a twat.

"Mighty and Ray should return"

Release the Epstein files.

why am i so randy?

“It was Truss, avenge me!”

"Over my dead body, Camilla!"

'Who is Queen? I am!'

No more hotsauce before bedtime!

Liz Truss done me dirty

Time to lick the toad

Have a Cup of Tea 😆

“So, Andrew IS a paedophile”

Candyman

The Queen Is Dead - choon.

Oh fuck I see fire

My back is killing me!

Andrew. Teabag. Truss. Broom cupboard...

i got warts. down there

Andrew was only a light pedophile.