Chris from Canada 🇨🇦

I might make a t-shirt with Trumps face on it that says "THAT'S CRAZY, Even I know that." Or not...

And I want gold stars damn it, lots of them, everyday. 🌟⭐💫

Returns, sweating, and a little disheveled.

Trump farts so much that his call sign should be redesignated to 'Air Force One'.

As are the snide & overly ardent.

WARNING: May contain trace elements of plastics and rat feces.

Well. 'Hiding in plain sight' didn't work.

America is operationally ineffectual, neutering itself as a country.

Why put off till tomorrow, what you can do the following day.

Uh-oh, man's aggressive nature has gotten him in trouble, again.

"Tilapia tastes better when you're drunk, pass it on." -Jesus

Don't let Google Maps see this.

When I said I was going to 'double-tap' you bae, I, I was talking about something completely different, sorry.

If #Trump were crushed by a steamroller on 5th avenue in New York, would he stick to the roller or the asphalt? Wylie Coyote minds want to know.

I think maybe it was #Putin peeing all over #Trump in #Russia, and still is.

Trumpflation permeates the nation.

Release the pedophiles... I mean 'Epstein files'.

NEVER BECOME DISTRACTED FROM THE... What was I on about again?

If I had a shield to keep from getting stabbed in the back all the time, I'd live to 190 too.

Trump's next job, 'Windmill Farm Keeper'... with a dog.

"My lies are so good, nobody lies like me." - #DonaldTrump ?

No. YOU will be charged $243.12.

Just lock them all in the ballroom and...

I wonder if they'll broadcast Donald Trump & Pete Hegseth's executions? Too soon?

I'm not a bad person, I'm just bad at lying.

Defiantly puts one leg of my pants on at a time, then falls over.

#DonaldTrump - Also see: 'Reoccurring Nightmare'.

How come all the vegetarian dishes taste like they need bacon?

In Canada reincows are known as carimoo.

Just let me know when I start sh*ting my pants because I'm not going to notice. -old folks humor.

Remember the golden rule, 'only use GROK to mock'.

I believe we've found the 'American Ocean' people.

Were #DonaldTrump a wild animal, he would be hunted for his magnificent bone spurs.

Remember when it took 6 years for movie sequels to come out, and you were lucky to get 12 episodes in a TV series season? Those were the days.

Little leprechauns who have to grant you three wishes, if you can catch one without it ripping your face off.

These guys should be attached to the back of our heads & running the show.🐙

I think by this point that socialism should probably have a superhero costume.

There's nothing more exciting, than finding out that you are one stream away from having a 'two stream watch streak'. Thank's for the chuckle #Twitch

That beeping you hear at intersections now may be great for blind people, but not so much for the schizophrenic.

How has somebody not transformed his veins into a swastika yet?

"What's it called when you're surrounded by your enemies & death is imminent? A target rich environment." -someone else

Given the migratory changes that so many species are exhibiting, I wonder how long it is before polar bears start eating penguins.

Rather than 'sending in the clowns', shouldn't they be sending them out?

If they had the same tenacity in the US as they do in Spain, the president of the United States would be out on his backside already.

I don't believe in a god, but I do believe in the devil.

I'm thinking I must have done something bad in another life & now I have to live out this one to humble me.

Remember everyone, don't forget to veil your threats if you feel obligated to make them.

The role wasn't bad but I was impressed how he stuck the Superman landing.

In case you didn't know, whether you're at a party or not, broccoli has the highest salad dressing retention ratio of all the veggies on the platter. You're welcome.

Sure, figs may look like an infestation of anal polyps when you open them up, but damn they're good.