Patrick

I met an executive from Sacramento and I told I've been to Sacramento on purpose and he wasn't thrilled

carefully arranging the bacon in the pan into a perfect pile

There’s a kid on our block who claims she’s good at everything. Kid, you’re like 8. You suck at literally everything. Talk to me when you retire and we can reevaluate.

As a a people, are the Portuguese essentially insane Spaniards?

If you're a random commercial actor and you're in an ad that opposes the billionaire tax in California, what the fuck are you doing. Scabs.

Somebody at @rotoworld-hoops.bsky.social recently learned the word accumulate and can't stop using it

Send BJT and George Pickens to SF. Easy SB win.

Walker Kessler now has the easiest job in the world for a tall person

It appears that an economy driven by advertising is actually bad

Hurry! Lock in your picks!

So apparently it’s not “best practice” to tell your small children if they listen closely while they’re chewing they can hear the food scream.

James Carville has looked on the verge of death for about 20 years. What’s his secret??

Have you seen that Gemini commercial where the guy easily gets a list of all of his subscriptions and can cancel them? I tried that and it only pulled up two that I have in my inbox. We've all generally arrived at the same conclusion that AI is bullshit but it's fun to see it firsthand.

@zkffb.bsky.social Will I get 3.04 points out of CMC tonight. If so, she’s a winner!

Some people actually love REM

I've been doing some experiments with ChatGPT. It's easy to see how stupid people and people with mental illness become so enamored. I can also see how lazy people would be enticed to offload their thinking onto AI. I knew these things intrinsically but I wondered why.

Putting cereal in the pressure cooker

My entire family is at Notre Dame this weekend. We haven't been since my dad got cancer 12 years ago. There were times I wondered if I would get to see another game with him, so this feels pretty special.

Vape Ape

If Philadelphia were a person

I feel so athletic when I smack a fly out of the air with my hand.

Who is the audience for the matchbox movie?

ESPN is a bastion of optimism. They'll be like this guy is going to score 12 points this week and you look at his box score and he's scored 11 points this season.

We’re not going to develop herd immunity if we rescue people like this

he think he slick

ATL legend Brian Robinson Jr

I had no idea Mike Tomlin was SO likable. He seems like a genuinely great human.

When the Trump administration says we should appreciate the sacrifices of law enforcement, including ICE, what sacrifice are they talking about exactly?

Went to see my parents yesterday and when I got there my mom was dual wielding leaf blowers.

Normalize non-alcoholic beer at work

CMC is washed, right?

This new breed of wide receiver…ugly. All of them.

My 3-year old has informed the three emotions are sad, mad, and medium.

Google's AI image generator is so unbelievably bad. At least ChatGPT can make a convincing image of Trump eating beans out of a toilet.

creatine donut

You ever not in the mood for things you don’t like?

A LEGIT FLOP!

hey whats up its me ya boy 2x multiplier

You gotta admit…the lead singer for As I Lay Dying paying someone to kill his wife is pretty metal. Oops, it was the feds! Not metal.

Cam Skattebo has definitely eaten dog food. On purpose.

The thing I'm looking forward to most in the future is not having to hear about Donald Trump anymore

I will not be taking questions.

Who are you rooting for tonight – the New York Giants or the Savannah Bananas?

It’s fine, these are my chili-making shorts

Microwaving an entire cauliflower and then submitting my two weeks

how come no one talks about zendaya's codpiece if dune

Is this Amazon broadcast dark for anyone else?

The dehumidifier I put outside is NOT working