rexforever.bsky.social

Oh nooooo Ervin Torres… 😫😫😫

My dog is furious that the squirrel on our fence post is not afraid of her.

The poll workers at Leander ISD Support Services in Cedar Park Tx were having way too much fun today. 0 line. #votetx

ICYMI: Buda unveiled 10-foot-tall wiener dog statue to commemorate its 25th anniversary over the weekend. https://www.kxan.com/news/local/buda/buda-unveils-10-foot-tall-wiener-dog-statue/

This is Tommy. Tommy had a question about my allegiances. Listen to the end to hear about his.

Just when you think MLS sponsors couldn’t be more weird - RBNY has an official spermbank.

BREAKING: Texas is considering selling a state park to Elon Musk, per sources. (Gift link).

@jamestalarico.bsky.social do you know why you’re not listed on the Williamson county dems ballot flyer?

Balatro wahooooo

A horror movie but it’s just a pediatric dentist showing parents X-rays of their kids’ skulls showing all the horrifying rows of teeth.

Everyone, my boss has asked for my opinion on the Man City charges. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

The thing that I love about English football is that they fucking love stripes. Striped top, stripe on the shorts, stripe on the socks. Maybe a cheeky stripe on the shoes. MLS could never.

My family’s weird inside joke/lore is that Shohei Ohtani is obsessed with bath and body works’ candle day. This is not real; it came out of a drunken conversation about candle day and where Ohtani would sign (pre-dodgers).

It’s really confusing when I get a flyer through the school district for a Senior Expo, but it’s not high school seniors, it’s senior citizens.

Got an election survey insisting on asking multiple times who I will vote for in the upcoming election for a local rep, and trying to convince me to vote for the GOP candidate. The problem? That is not my district! Welcome to the results of your gerrymandering, GOP.

Our lord & savior Brad Stuver is out for this match against San Diego. Go Las.

Trans Teen Hatches Nefarious Plot To Undergo Years Of Medical Treatments And Counseling To Win At Swimming https://theonion.com/trans-teen-hatches-nefarious-plot-to-undergo-years-of-m-1850433563/

Ok, two of the best children’s books of all time - by Oliver Jeffers - Stuck and This Moose Belongs to Me.

#austinfc

I was unfamiliar until recently with the story of Father Mychal Judge, a gay priest who became the first recorded casualty of 9/11 while administering last rites in the lobby of the North Tower. There is an effort to canonize him, which would make him the first openly gay saint in history.

Our Duty Free shop has some amazing deals on the new iPhone Duo.

I have coffeed too close to the sun

Hey do you want to barf together in front of the piano - conversations my dogs have, probably

if I promise to eat more pumpkin-flavored foods, will it stop

Is there a limit to how many jokes you can make about your sister’s cat being on lorazepam?

Apple TV MLS announcers just referred to Houston as “south texas” because they have apparently never seen Houston on a map.

Houston vs San Jose, the dude wipes championship

My favorite part of watching sportsball matches is trying to decide what the players are yelling at the referees. And then making up the most ridiculous option.

Omg MLS. No one cares about Leagues cup.

It is my favorite time of year, when GOP pollsters think my phone number belongs to my deceased in laws.

My headcanon is that the ilie red card all devolved from Biro’s inability to kick to the right. Arnaud starts yelling, f you ref, you know Biro can’t kick right (yellow) and then Ilie stands up and yells that the ref is clearly an anti leftite, an obvious slur, which is an auto red

Ugh it is happened again, e torres for f torres. The circle is completeee #austinfc

How the actual f do we have two reds, one of which was for a player on the f’ing bench OMG WHY AUSTIN

My kid’s theater group did 9 to 5 a few years ago and now Tim Curry? This is a rough week. :(

My favorite Dolly related meme, related obviously to her donation toward the Covid vaccine creation 😫

Why does slayyyter have 2 songs about chanel?

Things I have read on Nextdoor about Talarico: he plans to make veganism mandatory, has no girlfriend, is “low t”…

Badassssss Biro youtube.com/shorts/xX6CM...

Plathy on point tonight

WTF is this starting lineup Austin FC?!?

Me unapologetically sharing Sounders memes in preparation for the game against Austin FC tonight. It’s fine it’s fine It’s fine

‘Do You Have Any Idea Who I Am?’ Jalen Brunson Shouts At Librarian Refusing To Move Him Up ‘Lonesome Dove’ Waitlist https://theonion.com/do-you-have-any-idea-who-i-am-jalen-brunson-shouts-at-librarian-refusing-to-move-him-up-lonesome-dove-waitlist/

Good Charlotte Demoted to Third-Or-Fourth-Worst Thing Madden Brothers Have Done thehardtimes.net/breaking/goo...

*LIVERPOOL FC SELLS STAKE OF ABOUT 30% TO GROUP INCLUDING BEZOS

It gives me so much pleasure that the Talarico campaign put out an ad about Ken Paxton's pen thievery. His (alleged) crimes are many, but this is a great story that shows what an utter dirtbag he is. And the tag line! "James Talarico. He won't steal your pen."

Puppy has chosen violence much earlier than usual today.

They turned the friggin' frogs gay. Buy one now at store.theonion.com.